


New York State of Mind

by Jackie Mag



Category: Queer as Folk
Genre: Hurt-Comfort, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-03-27
Updated: 2012-04-18
Packaged: 2015-08-13 19:31:05
Rating: M
Chapters: 10
Words: 26,754
Publisher: www.fanfiction.net
Story URL: https://www.fanfiction.net/s/7964290/1/
Author URL: https://www.fanfiction.net/u/3001778/Jackie-Mag
Summary: In the series, Brian & Justin both have New York dreams at one point or another.  What if they never met & didn't connect for the first time until they were in New York?  Brian is slightly OOC because he sees the value of having someone special in life.





	1. CHAPTER ONE – MEETING IN NEW YORK

Prologue

In 2001, Brian got the offer from Adam Wyatt at Kennedy & Collins advertising agency and moved to New York. His loyal assistant Cynthia moved to New York also. He's still close with the old gang back in Pittsburgh, but has made quite a success in his new life. In 2003, Ted was recovering from his addiction and Brian asked him to move to New York to manage some of Kennedy & Collins' finances. In 2004, Brian faced cancer (more or less) alone, with only minimal help from Ted and Cynthia.

Justin never really hit the bars on Liberty Avenue. He was not 'out' to his parents. He didn't tell them so that he could be sure they would pay for his college art degree. He guessed (rightfully so) that if his dad knew he was gay he'd be cut off from any family funds. (He's not 'out', so no bashing occurred.) In his sophomore year he secretly dated Ethan for a few months, but broke up when he caught Ethan cheating on him. He dated other guys and sometimes would just pick up a guy to trick with, enjoying a single lifestyle in his college years. He came out to his recently divorced parents just after graduation from college. His father would not talk to him afterwards. His mother has accepted Justin's homosexuality and was supportive.

While studying art he went to the Sydney Bloom gallery and befriended Lindsay who encouraged him to show his work at the Gay & Lesbian Center. Justin got a four year art degree from PIFA and graduated in 2004. After a small gallery show, an article came out in _Art Forum_ magazine about Justin. Lindsay encouraged him to go to New York to follow his dream. He shares an apartment with his best friend Daphne's friend Janice and works as a bus boy.

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Sunday, July 10, 2005

**Brian's POV**

_I'm 35. I've been chasing men for, hell, 20 years now. Back in Pittsburgh I was tricking all of the time. When I first moved to New York I enjoyed the 'fresh meat' here. Changing to a new firm in a new city has been demanding, though, and I haven't been able to trick as much as I did back in the Pitts. To tell you the truth, it just doesn't have the appeal it used to. _

_Anyway, this one night I was at a bar with Greg and Jerry from the art department at Kennedy & Collins. It was slim pickings that night. Oh, yeah, guys still give me the eye and an appreciative nod, but I didn't see anybody I was really interested in doing anything with. I still enjoy the chase and I'll enjoy tricking occasionally, but there's not as much satisfaction from it. And I have no interest in remembering that one jackass who pointed out the scar and actually had the fucking balls to try and sympathize. I wanted a fucking blow job, not therapy. Kind of changes one's perspective on tricking after that. _

_I'd had enough with the bar. It was a Sunday. I just wanted to go back to my condo, relax and watch an old movie. I said goodbye to Greg and Jerry. As I left the bar I lit a cigarette and then I looked up to see this … vision. This young man, probably mid-twenties, is standing at a nearby lamppost like he's waiting for someone. He had great blond hair, a beautiful face and a nice build. Something about him exuded sexuality and innocence all at the same time. When I first saw him, his head was slightly cocked. We locked eyes on each other and he straightened up. God, he was beautiful. Then, some gal came out of a nearby bar and he turned his attention to her. They were obviously friends. I'd say maybe more than friends, but my gaydar meter was pegged to 'gay' on this guy just from the way he looked at me. Anyway, he put his arm around her and they walked away. But, just before he was about to turn a corner he turned back and looked at me again with this grin on his face like … sunshine. Fuck, I could have had him._

**End POV**

Wednesday, July 13, 2005

Cynthia entered Brian's office. "Hey, Brian. Here's the file you requested and Lindsay is on line two."

"Thanks. … Lindsay, how's it going? Is everything OK?"

"Yes, Brian. Everything is fine. Gus is doing great. We miss you. I'm calling to tell you I'll be in New York in a couple of days and I was wondering if I could stay with you."

"No Mel?"

"No. No Mel."

"OK, then. You can have the guest room. What brings you here?"

"A gallery opening for a friend."

"Really? OK. I can go with you. There will probably be some pickings for me there. I haven't fucked an artist type in a while."

"Sure, Brian." She chuckled. "So, when are you going to be back in Pittsburgh? Gus would like to see you."

"I'll be back in Pittsburgh in a few days. Mikey has insisted that I go to that thing at Babylon with him."

"Great! Gus will be thrilled. How's work?"

"It's for shit right now. I've got a new campaign that I can't get a handle on. I'm looking at this art and I know something's wrong, but I can't say what. Too bad you can't look at it and give me an artist's viewpoint."

"I know someone who might be able to help you."

"Who's that?"

"There's a young man that I know from Pittsburgh who has recently moved to New York. He's got a degree in art from PIFA. He's familiar with all forms of art and did posters for the GLC once for me. I don't think you ever met him. As a matter of fact, he's the artist friend that I'm going to see at that gallery show."

"What's his name?"

"Justin Taylor."

"Do you think he could help me out?"

"Why, Brian Kinney … are you admitting that you might need help with something?"

"Fuck you, Lindsay. Just give me this Jason's number."

"Justin."

"Justin. What's his number?"

"Um, 212-555-0710. He's in the Village. He might be able to come in and look at your stuff."

"Many men have looked at my stuff, Lindsay."

"And I'm sure they've been very impressed."

"Is he hot? I assume if he worked on something for the GLC that he's gay."

"Yes and yes."

"Hmmm. I'll call him right away."

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Within the hour, Brian gave Justin a call. The soft voice on the phone said, "Hello?"

"Hello, Justin Taylor?"

"Yes. Who is this?"

"My name is Brian Kinney. I'm a friend of Lindsay's from Pittsburgh."

"Of course, Brian. Lindsay's told me about you. You're Gus's father, right?"

"Yes. She gave me your number. Listen, I need a discerning eye on some art for an ad campaign I'm working on. I was wondering if you could come in and look at this shit and tell me what's wrong with it. I'll pay you a consultant fee."

"Sure, I'm not busy this afternoon. I can cab over there in a half an hour. You're on Madison Avenue?"

After Brian gave Justin the address and particulars on his office they concluded their phone call.

Less than an hour later, Cynthia entered her boss's office. "A Justin Taylor here to see you, Brian."

"Sure, send him in."

Brian's POV

_Then he walked into my office. The blond vision. The guy from the lamppost. He was dressed professionally with wool pants and a nice sweater. Damn, he was hot. He strolled in and reached out to shake my hand._

End POV

"Justin. Thanks for being here." They shook hands.

"Sure. No problem. Lindsay has told me all about you. It's nice to finally meet you."

"Nice to meet you. I feel like we've met before." Brian said tongue in cheek, knowing that he'd seen the blond at the lamppost a few nights before. "Let's go to the art department and look at those boards."

They walked down the hall and chatted briefly about the ad campaign that Brian was putting together for a new beer label. Once they got to the art department, Justin looked at the artwork for the new beer.

Brian said, "I'm trying to appeal to the 25-40 demographic. I want to sell it as a more accessible drink than wine, but with a lot of class."

"I think the lettering style is wrong for that idea. It should be classier, maybe a script font."

They discussed the boards further and Justin had several ideas about how to change the appearance of the ads. Brian was impressed and saw to it that a lot of the changes were initiated.

Back in Brian's office the ad exec talked further to his young consultant. "Thanks for your help. I can see to it that you get a consultant fee. Like, $500?"

"I don't know. I just did this for my friend Lindsay and … you."

"Come on. I know you're an artist starting out here in New York."

"OK. How much is the campaign worth again?"

"About half a million dollars."

"All right, then I want $1000, Mr. Kinney."

Brian smiled. "Call me Brian. I like the way you work, Justin." He shook his hand and then put his arm around the young man. He got on the intercom, "Cynthia, have Theodore write up a check for Justin Taylor for $1000."

"_Right away, boss."_

"Since this worked out so well today, maybe you could come back some time and consult again. There are entry-level art department positions all of the time, too. Do you think you might be interested?"

"Sure. As long as it doesn't interfere with my being able to paint or sell my art."

"Of course. I'd like to buy you dinner or a drink or something to thank you personally. Are you busy later?" Brian ran his hand over Justin's back in a slow and sensual way.

"Well, I might have to fly out to Atlantic City with my agent tonight to meet a potential buyer for some commissioned art. But, I'll admit that your offer is … attractive." Justin pulled briefly on Brian's tie. Lindsay had told Justin all about him. Sure enough, he was hot, sensual, gorgeous, and flirtatious.

Brian took the signals coming from the young man as a go ahead to go further. "How attractive?" His hand went from Justin's back to around his waist, pulling him closer.

"Very attractive." He smiled and tilted his head towards the taller man's.

Brian leaned down and placed a gentle kiss on Justin's lips, and then spoke with his lips at the young man's cheek. "Then we _definitely_ have to get together."

Ted burst into the office. "Here's that check, Brian. Oh, hi."

Brian was disappointed that his 'moment' with the blond was interrupted. "Justin, this is Theodore Schmidt, our accountant. Theodore, this is Justin Taylor, a consultant."

Ted shook Justin's hand. "Nice to meet you, Justin. Here's your check."

"Theodore. Nice to meet you."

"Call me Ted."

"Ted. You're from Pittsburgh, right? I remember Lindsay mentioning you. I'm from there, too."

"Oh, OK. How long have you known Lindsay?"

"About four years now. I moved to New York just over a month ago."

Brian was getting tired of all of the pleasantries, especially when he wanted to arrange some more quality time with Justin. "That'll be all for now, Theodore." He forced a smile.

"Sure, Brian. See you around, Justin? Take care." He left.

Justin smiled and put the check in his wallet. Brian approached him again. "So, dinner?"

"Let me call my agent and find out when the flight is." He opened his cell phone and dialed. "Hey, Carol, it's Justin. When are we flying out?" He listened and then showed disappointment. "Tonight at 7:10 pm. OK. No that's fine. I'll meet you at your place at around 5:30, then? OK. 'Bye."

"Damn."

"Yeah, I know. Rain check. Some other time?" Justin said.

"Definitely. I'll call."

"Here's my card." They exchanged business cards.

"I'll have to thank Lindsay for bringing you to me."

Justin smiled. "Not as much as _I'll_ be thanking her."

Brian pulled at the young man's waist again and they kissed again with tongues gently coming in to play. "How about I take you into the copy room right now and we make a hundred copies of various sexual positions on top of the copier?"

"Hmmm. You are very forward, Mr. Kinney."

Every time Justin called him 'Mr. Kinney', Brian could feel his cock twitch.

Cynthia was the next person to burst into Brian's office. "Brian. Oh, Sorry. Marla Jones on line two."

"Damn it! Can't you people see that I'm busy? Tell her I'll call her back."

"It's about that beer campaign. She insists on talking to you about it personally."

Justin smiled and sighed as he placed his hand on the side of Brian's face, which was showing obvious signs of exasperation. "Call me. I'll see you around."

"OK. Good luck in Atlantic City. Lindsay and I will see you at your gallery opening."

Brian sat behind his desk and watched Justin's back side appreciatively as he left. _We'll meet again Justin. And, next time, with no interruptions._


	2. CHAPTER TWO – THE GALLERY OPENING

Friday, July 15, 2005

Lindsay was very excited to have two days in New York City by herself, no kids. She and Melanie were having a rough time, but Melanie agreed to watch Gus for Lindsay long enough to go to a gallery opening in which one of Justin's paintings was being displayed.

Brian met her at the airport and they unloaded her bag at his place before they left to meet Justin for dinner. Lindsay was wearing a simple black dress and heels. Brian had put on his dark grey Armani suit for the evening.

"So, what do you think of Justin?" She asked Brian in the cab on the way to the restaurant.

"He's talented. He's hot. And, most importantly, he wants me." He gave his patented grin. "We weren't able to get together when we met a couple of days ago, but, hopefully tonight."

"Really?"

"I plan on taking him back to my place tonight and fucking his brains out."

"Brian!"

"What? You know me. When I see what I want …" He whispered, "We'll try not to make it too noisy, but I can't promise."

"Justin is not just some guy … some random trick. He's a caring, loving, sweet young man. You'd better not just use him and toss him aside."

Brian considered her words and thought of his meeting with Justin. "I can tell that he's different."

"If you ask me …" Lindsay started, and then glanced at Brian who was giving her the 'I didn't ask you' look. She started in again anyway. "Like that's ever stopped me … Justin might be just what you need. You have a lot in common, both coming from Pittsburgh to New York to follow your dream. Your dad was certainly less than perfect. Justin's dad just found out that he's gay and won't speak to him. Justin is a loyal friend and the kind of guy who could stick with anyone, even you. He was dating a guy from college, Ethan. They broke up because Ethan messed it up, not Justin."

"So, you have him and me married off in your head, eh? The happy little couple like Lindsay and Melanie, two kids and a little house." He looked at her incredulously. "Jesus, Linds, I haven't even fucked him yet!" He looked out the window. "I've only even kissed him twice."

"Kissed him, eh?"

"Yeah. … Twice." Brian remembered the kisses and, for a moment, couldn't think of anything else. _Those soft and sweet raspberry colored lips._

"Brian? Hello?"

Brian snapped out of his daze and regained his character. He looked at Lindsay with a grin. "Did I mention that he wants me?" She just rolled her eyes.

They'd reached their destination. They exited the cab and Brian paid the driver. He smiled at Lindsay.

She gave him a knowing look. "I know you want him, too, but I don't even think _you_ know how much." He smirked, refusing to think about what she meant, knowing she might be right.

Justin was waiting near the maitre d' station and greeted Lindsay with a hug. He was dressed in a nice form fitting black turtleneck sweater and grey dress pants. "Lindsay! So good to see you."

"Justin, you look great! Congratulations on getting a piece in this show for tonight. And Sam hooked you up with an agent already? Awesome!"

"I wouldn't have been able to do it without you." He turned to Brian. "Hello, Brian."

"You're looking hot tonight." The ad exec put a polite kiss on Justin's cheek, and then whispered in his ear. "Very hot." Brian was pleased and surprised to see the blond blush.

"Thanks. You, too. Come on, guys, our table is ready." Justin said.

They enjoyed dinner while talking and laughing. Lindsay talked to the guys about people that they knew in common and other shared experiences. They all marveled that they had never met, but it's just how the fates had deemed it.

At one point they were talking about Pittsburgh and the Liberty Diner was mentioned. "I've been there. That head waitress there, Deb, is a _freak_, but I really like her. She calls me 'Sunshine'."

"Debbie is my best friend Mikey's mom. She's like a second mom to me."

Justin gave a sheepish grin, hoping he didn't say anything bad. "I said that I really like her, right?"

Brian huffed a laugh. "And you've correctly assessed that she's a freak. She's a gay man in a straight woman's body."

They all had a laugh. At one point during dinner, Lindsay excused herself to the ladies' room.

"So, Sunshine, would you like to come back to my place with Lindsay and me?" He moved closer to the young man until they were practically nose to nose. "I'd be happy to give you the _complete_ tour: kitchen, living room, _master bedroom_."

"Ever with the attractive offers, Mr. Kinney. Yes, I think I'm free to join you."

"Hopefully we'll _join_ over and over again tonight." They kissed.

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They left the restaurant and went to the gallery. Justin was proud of his painting that was on display. It was an impressionistic painting of a fair haired young man leaning against a tree in a park, his head on a slight angle. It reminded Brian of the first time he saw Justin at that streetlamp. Brian said. "Wonderful painting. I like how the texture and angle of the brushstrokes emphasizes the man and brings your attention the subject." Brian looked at the artist intently. "You can't help but stare at him."

Justin looked up at Brian, met his eyes and blushed again. "Thanks. It's kind of a self-portrait. I like going to the park to people watch."

"I like watching you." Brian silently took Justin's hand, pulled him into the men's washroom, into a stall, and closed the door. He pinned the blond against the wall and began a toe-curling passionate kiss like Justin had never experienced before. One of Brian's hands was behind the blond's head and the other around his waist, pulling their bodies impossibly closer. Justin reciprocated the kiss and matched his actions, move for move. They had both wanted contact for some time and their passions were evident in the kiss.

Finally, they broke the kiss and Brian spoke breathlessly. "I want you, but not here. I'm going to take you back to my place and ravage you, fuck you all night long."

Justin just smiled and nodded. Brian was evoking feelings in him that he'd never felt before. Wanting … longing …. He knew that his encounter with this hot brunet was going to be amazing and he couldn't wait.

They kissed again for a while, but then stopped to regain their composure. They exited the stall and straightened themselves, holding their jackets in front of themselves to cover the bulges in their pants.

Lindsay thoroughly enjoyed the gallery and had a long conversation with the owner, Edmund Ashburn, so she didn't notice that the guys had been away. She introduced him to Brian and the four of them conversed for a while. Justin's roommate Janice showed up and got introduced all around. Lindsay, Janice and Justin moved about the room as Brian continued to talk to Edmund. Brian handed him his card and they shook hands.

Janice was alone with Justin at one point. "So, that's Brian Kinney, eh? He's gorgeous."

Justin smiled at her and then looked over at Brian. "I think he's incredible. He kissed me earlier, Janice. It was like no kiss I've ever had before."

"He kissed you here at the gallery?"

"In the bathroom."

"Right, famous encounter spot for gay boys." She smiled. "So, good kisser?"

"It redefined the word _kiss_. It was like sex with our clothes on. Oh, and Janice…"

"Yeah?"

"Don't wait up for me tonight."

"Oh, my God. You're going back to his place and … why you dirty boy! Good for you. I want details tomorrow."

Lindsay and Brian walked up and acknowledged Janice. "Ready to go?" Brian asked as he glanced at Justin.

"Yes." Lindsay winced. "I have to get out of these shoes."

Brian leaned over to Justin and spoke to him as if to explain. "Lesbians don't usually wear high heels." The young man snickered.

"Hey, fuck you, Brian! Like you've never sacrificed comfort for fashion. I seem to remember you recently bought a pair of Gucci loafers that you were complaining about." He smirked back at her. Justin and Janice chuckled at their exchange.

Janice said her goodbyes and took off for home.

Brian stepped to the curb to hail a cab. Lindsay turned to take a last look at the gallery and, when she turned back, she fell off of her right shoe. Her foot turned and she tumbled to the pavement.

"Lindsay, are you all right?" Brian began to pull her up. Justin picked up her purse and offered an arm.

"Yeah, I'm …" Lindsay began to say, and then her ankle gave way again. She would have fallen, if not for the guys holding her up.

After some discussion and trials with the now beginning to swell ankle, Brian said. "We're taking you to the hospital. It might be broken."

Justin agreed. "You can't be too careful, Lindsay."

A cab transported the trio to a local hospital. Lindsay hopped with the guys on either side of her. She was taken away for an x-ray as the guys sat in the waiting room. Justin was holding Lindsay's purse and her shoes were next to him on the floor.

Brian phoned Melanie and explained what happened. He knew that the lesbians' marriage had been rocky lately, but he figured Mel should know about Lindsay getting hurt.

After he hung up with Mel, Brian groused. "This is not exactly what I wanted to be doing right now."

"I'm sure that's true for everyone in here, Brian."

"Justin?"

"Yeah?"

"That purse looks fabulous on you."

"Thanks a lot, asshole." They both laughed. "Too bad the shoes won't fit me."

When Lindsay spoke to the doctor he told her that she had a severe sprain and should stay off of her foot as much as possible. She got a pair of crutches and had a hard time adjusting to use them.

Brian said, "I'll take you back to my place and you can rest."

Lindsay was upset that this had happened to her. "What about when I have to go to the bathroom? How am I supposed to do that? And don't tell me I can move with these crutches because I suck at these things."

"I'll be there to help you and I'll fly back to Pittsburgh with you tomorrow. I was going to go back anyway for that thing at Babylon, so I'll just go a day early."

Justin said. "I can come with you guys and help you out. While one of us helps her walk, the other can be managing the bags and stuff. It's too much for you to try to do alone, Brian."

"If you wouldn't mind, that'd be great. I'll pay for your ticket." Brian said. He gave Justin an appreciative smile. _It'll be good to have him to help. I can see that he's loyal to Lindsay – a good man. Now I'm just hotter for him._

"Thanks, I'll take you up on that. I can visit my mom. She's already complaining that she misses me."

Brian phoned Mel again and handed the phone to Lindsay. Mel agreed to help Lindsay at the house until she could walk again.

They all got into a cab, Brian sitting in the middle. Justin said, "I think I'll go back to my place tonight and pack a bag. I can meet you guys at the airport tomorrow. Call me with the flight time."

Brian said. "I thought we had plans."

"You have your hands full with Lindsay. Don't worry – we'll get together."

Brian was obviously disappointed but understood. Lindsay was going to need help during the night and Brian would not have been able to give Justin his full attention. "OK. But promise me that you'll whack off tonight thinking of me."

Lindsay overheard. "Brian!"

Justin smiled shyly. He whispered, "I promise." He kissed Brian and slid his hand suggestively up his thigh. "As long as you promise to do the same thing, handsome." Brian growled in appreciation and nodded. They kissed again.

Justin gave the cab his address and said his goodbyes. Brian got Lindsay to the condo and helped her with her needs that night.

Janice was at their apartment watching T.V. when he got home. "Hey, Justin. I thought you were going to Sir Studly's tonight."

"Lindsay hurt her ankle – twisted it real bad."

"Oh, poor thing! I hope she's OK."

"She'll be fine. Brian's taking care of her tonight, so I excused myself. I'm going to fly home with them tomorrow and help Brian with Lindsay. She's on crutches."

"Get a wheelchair once you get to the airport. That'll beat crutches for her."

"Good idea."

"Well it'll be nice for you to be able to visit your Mom and all. I know you've been homesick. Are you going to tell them at work you can't come in?"

"I hadn't thought about it. Yeah, I'll phone tomorrow morning. You know, Brian said I might be able to get an entry-level art department position at his advertising firm, Kennedy and Collins. That'd be sweet."

"Sweet working for him." She gave a knowing look. "With him. Under him…" They laughed. "You really like him, don't you?"

"He's … I don't know. I've never been so attracted to someone. But it's more than that. I feel like I have so much in common with him and I just like being with him." He sighed. "I hope I'm not just going to be another notch in his belt."

"Don't get into a relationship with a man thinking that you're going to change him. That never works. Trust me, I've been there."

"I know he fucks around a lot. He's got quite a reputation, according to Lindsay." He shrugged his shoulders. "But, hey, I like dating around, too."

"You like _dating_ and he likes _fucking_. There's a difference there."

They talked until very late. In their short time together Justin and Janice had developed a close friendship. He valued her opinion and she became a surrogate Daphne for him. She was friends with Daphne, after all, and they had the same caring nature and fun sense of humor.

As Brian was helping Lindsay climb into bed for the last time of the night she said, "Thanks, Brian, for helping me today."

"Sure. You can pay me back by buying me new Gucci loafers. A size bigger this time."

She chuckled. "It's great that you can help me." She paused. "You said that Ted helped you during your cancer? And Cynthia?"

"Yeah, just through the really bad days. They weren't my top choice, but I didn't have anyone else."

"Don't you think that you'd like someone in your life that you can care for and can take care of you, too?"

Brian smirked and then got a more serious look on his face. "Before cancer, I would have said 'no fucking way'. But now, I don't know."

"Mel looks out for me and brings me chicken soup, her Jewish penicillin, when I have a cold. I hold her hand when she has to go to the dentist – she hates dentist appointments." She started to tear up a little, thinking about the trouble she and Mel were having in their marriage. "We watch out for each other, you know?"

"Yeah, I guess."

"Look how Michael watched over Ben when he was in the hospital. If Mike hadn't been there to tell the nurse that Ben should NOT get the HIV cocktail, Ben might have died. Michael probably saved his life."

"I don't want somebody hovering over me, watching my every move. I don't want anyone to answer to."

"How about somebody to come home to? Someone to make love to?"

"I don't make love. I fuck."

"You should try lovemaking once in a while."

"I'm not interested."

"Yes, you are, you lying sack of shit!" Lindsay hit his arm and Brian winced as if in great pain. Then, they both smiled.

"Wendy, I don't want to grow up."

"You will have to someday, Peter."

Brian shook his head. "Is this all about you wanting me to get together with Justin? Trust me; I've tried to on more than one occasion."

"It's not about you scoring with Justin. It's about you having someone, anyone, to be with."

Brian reclined on the bed and sighed as he closed his eyes. They were silent for a moment while Lindsay waited for him to gather his thoughts. She ran her fingers through his hair until he finally spoke. "I have considered lately that maybe it'd be nice to have a guy to be close to, a regular friend or lover … someone loyal to me to share things with."

"That's great, Brian." She smiled at him as he looked at her again. "Who do you hang out with here in New York? Ted? I can't imagine that."

He snorted at the thought of being with Theodore more than eight hours a day. "No. I mostly hang out with these two guys from work from the art department, Greg and Jerry. They're OK."

"Are they gay?"

"Jerry's straight, but is cool about gays. He did a lot of theater in college, so he has a lot of gay friends. Greg goes both ways. He says he's straight, but I've seen him fuck guys in the back room, so…"

"What about that guy that got you the job here?"

"Adam Wyatt? We meet for drinks now and then. I had him once and you know my rule…"

"Only once, yeah. Don't you get lonely?"

Brian ran his hands over his face and closed his eyes. "Sometimes." He looked at her. "But, if my alternative is tiring conversations like this, I'll take the quiet." He stood up and jerked his thumb toward the door. "Listen, I promised Justin I'd whack off thinking about him and you know I never break a promise."

"Ewww. Whatever. Good night, Brian."

He leaned over, kissed her and ran his thumb over her cheek. He left the room.

Lindsay whispered, "I love you, too, Brian."


	3. CHAPTER THREE  EVENING AT BABYLON

Saturday, July 16, 2005

They packed up in the morning and met Justin at the airport. He had a wheelchair waiting for Lindsay, which helped immensely.

The flight to Pittsburgh went OK. Justin graciously turned down Brian's offer to be initiated into the mile high club. The hour and a half from NY to PA flight only had about fifteen minutes of 'no seatbelt' time and they'd have been rushed. That was _not_ the way Justin wanted to start their physical relationship.

Once in Pittsburgh, Brian picked up a rental car and the guys got Lindsay back home to Melanie, who had a wheelchair waiting for her injured wife. Brian gave Gus a big hug and spent an hour talking to and playing with his son. Justin helped Mel make coffee and they sat with Lindsay and visited while watching Brian and Gus talking and laughing.

Justin hated to interrupt, but Brian had told him he'd drop him off at Jennifer's. They said their goodbyes and got back into the rental car. As they reached his mom's townhome, Justin said, "Why don't you come inside and meet my mom?"

"I don't know. How are you going to introduce me? 'Hi, Mom. This is the guy I'm hoping to fuck soon.'"

The young man rolled his eyes, "How about as a friend of Lindsay's, Gus's father, another guy from the Pitts who is now in New York …?"

"OK. OK."

They went inside and Justin made the introductions. Jennifer insisted that they both have something to eat. After a pleasant lunch catching up, Justin asked Brian to come upstairs and see his old room. The young man showed him some of his old sketches and photographs.

"These sketches are amazing, Justin. You have a great eye." Brian was truly impressed. "But, these sketches of high school boys … I don't know."

"What?"

"You need a _man_ to model for you." He raised an eyebrow suggestively.

Justin smiled and replied, "I'll consider any offer." He kissed Brian as he took the sketch book from him.

Brian looked at an old photo of Justin with his mother, father and sister.

"Lindsay told me that your father won't have anything to do with you now that he knows you're gay."

"He just won't talk to me. At least he paid for my education before he cut me off."

Brian nodded. "My father wouldn't have won any awards, either. He was an abusive drunk."

"He passed away?"

"Yeah, last year."

"I'm sorry."

"I'm not." Brian got up and looked at a shelf in the closet. He spied an old teddy bear and brought it out.

"Hey, put him back." Justin reached, unsuccessfully, for the bear.

"Aww, it's widdle Justin's widdle teddy beawr." He dusted him off a little. "What's his name?"

"Gus."

"No shit. Really?"

"Yeah, really."

"Did you sleep with him all of the time?" Brian held the bear and pretended to suck his thumb.

Justin smiled and grabbed the bear from his friend's hands. "Used to. Sure." He straightened the bear's fur and returned him to his shelf home.

"Who do you sleep with now?" Brian moved up behind Justin and ran his hands from the young man's waist to his butt.

Justin turned to face his friend. "It seems I have an opening for teddy bear. Are you _up_ for it?" His hand explored the front of Brian's pants. "Hmmm. Seems that you are." They looked at each other for a second and the desire for each other took over again. They kissed with tongues dueling.

Brian's hand went down inside the back of the blond's pants and skillfully slid down until a finger found its target and poked into his entrance, causing Justin to gasp at the unexpected move. "You said something about having an opening."

Justin closed his eyes and smiled. "God, you make me so fucking hot." He squirmed in appreciation for the probing finger attacking him. He had never met a man who could do so many incredible things to him in such a short time. Every look, every kiss, everything that Brian did made Justin want him more.

They kissed again. Brian angled his head so his tongue could fully enter the blond's sweet mouth. As the kiss broke, he said, "Come to Babylon with me tonight. Then we'll go to Mikey's and fuck all night long."

Justin was breathless with desire and couldn't formulate any response other than, "OK."

A minute later, they heard voices downstairs. Molly was home from school and entered the townhouse. "Mom? Whose car is in the driveway?"

The guys could hear the gals chatting and knew it would only be a matter of time before the little sister was upstairs, so Brian retracted his hand and they straightened up a little. Sure enough, a voice came from the hallway. "Justin?"

"Hey, Mollusk, in here." They hugged each other. "How are you?"

"I'm great. What a nice surprise. Um." She looked over at Brian and smiled.

"Brian Kinney, this is my sister Molly Taylor. Molly, this is my friend Brian from New York. He's originally from Pittsburgh, too."

Molly was old enough to appreciate a handsome man and Brian was quite striking. "Hi."

"Pleased to meet you, Molly Taylor." Brian kissed her hand. She blushed. _Just like her brother does._

They talked for a while and then the guys went downstairs. As Justin retrieved his bag from the rental car, Jennifer cornered Brian for a moment. "I know that you and Justin have just met, but, can I ask that you look in on him from time to time? I'm concerned for him in the big city by himself. I mean, seeing that you're a friend of Lindsay's too and Gus's dad I thought maybe …"

"Sure, Mrs. Taylor."

"Call me Jennifer."

"Jennifer. Here's my business card. This one has my cell number on it, too. Call me if you need me to do something for you. Anytime."

"Great! Thanks. Here's my real estate card. I've written my home number down."

He smiled and put it in his wallet. "He's going to be fine in New York, though, you'll see. He's already sold his first piece."

"He did? He didn't mention that."

Brian whispered, "That's because he doesn't know that it's sold or that I bought it. Shhh." He put his finger over his lips. Jennifer smiled and mimed the 'shhh' finger to her lips. Brian continued with a smile, "He's really very talented. I've encouraged him to apply for an art department position at the advertising firm where I work."

"Oh, that's excellent! Thank you, Brian." She touched his arm and he patted her hand.

Jennifer watched Brian's eyes light up when Justin re-entered the townhome with his bag. She could sense that there was something more to her son's relationship with Brian than just friends. Her suspicions were confirmed when she saw Justin sneak a goodbye kiss to Brian. She was a little concerned that Brian was at least ten years older than her son, but she had a feeling that the age difference wasn't an issue with the two of them. She was glad that Brian was very successful and could, possibly, financially help Justin once and a while. She was sure Justin was too proud to take any handouts, but might be able to borrow a few bucks now and then, if needed. Just knowing that there was a good man out there to look after her son made her feel better.

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Brian returned later to pick Justin up to go to Babylon.

Justin asked, "What is this event tonight?"

"It's a fundraiser for opposition to Proposition 16. Cyndi Lauper is performing. Should be packed."

They parked the rental car and checked their coats at the front door of Babylon. Sure enough, there were extensive decorations and hot bodies were everywhere.

Brian asked, "Have you ever been here before?"

"I thought about it a hundred times and even tried to get in once, then they explained the membership card thing and I chickened out. I decided to concentrate on college and hung out at bars near school."

"Bo-ring. Pathetic."

Michael and Ben were at the bar. Ted had flown in, too, and was there with his date, who looked pretty nervous. Emmett was there, going over his M.C. notes for the evening. He remembered that Justin came into Torso once and bought a shirt from the markdown rack. Brian introduced Justin all around.

As Emmett and Justin danced for a while, Ted sidled up to Brian. "So, Brian, have you had him yet? I mean, you met him three days ago, that's plenty of time for you."

"No, but have no fear, Theodore. His ass will be mine tonight."

At one point, Justin was alone at the bar and Michael came up to talk to him. "How long have you known Brian?"

"Just a few days. He's great. And so hot."

"Most of the guys at Babylon would agree with you. He's had almost all of them."

"Had, as in …?"

"Fucked."

"Oh, I see." Lindsay had warned Justin a little about Brian's ways, but hearing it put so bluntly from Michael was still disconcerting to the young man, especially when seeing the sea of gay men in the place.

Michael warned Justin. "He doesn't do boyfriends, so if you're having any thoughts about that, you can just forget them."

"We just kissed a few times. I wasn't planning on having him as my boyfriend. Lindsay warned me enough, too."

"OK. You seem like a good kid. I just hate to see anyone hurt, you know?" Michael still loved Brian and even though he was now married to Ben, there was a part of Michael that wanted Brian to stay the way he was: Brian fucking Kinney, the stud of Liberty Avenue … or Madison Avenue. Michael didn't think settling down suited Brian and was protective of him. Justin seemed OK, but Michael didn't want anyone trying to change his friend.

What Michael didn't know is that Brian had been thinking about what Lindsay said about finding someone to be with. He wasn't the same man he'd been in the last few years; things had changed. He saw how good Michael and Ben were together. He knew that Lindsay and Mel had had their ups and downs, but even now Mel was helping Lindsay when she was hurt. Even Debbie had a fiancé.

Brian had been tricking around since high school and had found a lot of satisfaction from all of his conquests through the years. His taste for constant affirmation from other guys, though, was waning. His 'fuck once' policy was wearing a little thin and he could consider that maybe, just maybe, being with one guy more than once could be satisfying, too. He didn't know if Justin would be that guy. Hell, he didn't even know how good the blond was in the sack. There was something about Justin, though, that was special. He'd certainly proven his loyalty to his friends. He was easy to get along with and knew how to give as good as he got. His artistic talent was impressive. He had a fun, quirky way of doing things that Brian found fascinating.

The evening went on and everyone enjoyed dancing and listening to Cyndi Lauper perform. Then, the unthinkable happened. There was a huge explosion that ripped through Babylon. Michael was severely hurt, being close to the blast. The ambulances started to arrive and police and firemen were all over.

After the initial shock, Brian's first thought was of Justin. He had been a few feet away from him, so it took them a little while to find each other. They did and embraced.

"Are you OK?" Brian asked.

"Yeah, you?"

"I'm fine. I think Michael is hurt bad. I'm going to the hospital."

"I'll go with you."

In the hours after the blast, Michael went into surgery to stop his internal bleeding. Reports came in that there were at least five people that died. Detective Carl Horvath told the waiting room group of Michael's friends that the squad suspected that it was a bomb. Debbie went into the chapel to pray and Brian spent some time with her there. The rest of the evening he sat with his friends. Justin held his hand and tried to offer words of comfort. After Michael was out of surgery it was just a waiting game to see if he could recover. Justin told Brian, "You're exhausted. There's nothing more we can do here. We should get some rest."

"I'm staying at Michael and Ben's."

"I know. Do you want some company tonight? I've already called my mom to tell her I'm OK and that I'd be gone all night."

They spoke to Ben, who promised he'd phone Brian's cell if there were any changes. Brian and Justin returned to the rental car and drove to Michael and Ben's house. Brian pulled up into the driveway. He and Justin got out and entered the home. Brian showed Justin around a little, pointing out the kitchen and the other rooms. They entered Hunter's bedroom and Brian pulled some clean clothes for himself from his suitcase. He was holding them when he turned to Justin, "I've got to clean up. I'm going to take a shower. You'll need to, too. Do you want some clothes? I'm sure Michael's stuff would fit you."

"Sure. If you think that's OK."

"Justin, you're here to support all of us … borrowing a pair of sweats isn't going be a problem."

Justin smiled. "OK. Yeah, whatever you can find."

Brian put his own clothes on the master bed and opened Michael's closet. He began to look for something for Justin to wear. Brian pulled out a t-shirt and sweatpants, but was overcome again when looking at Michael's things. _What if he doesn't make it? How can I deal with the loss of my best friend? _Brian handed the clothes to Justin and quickly turned away to hide his emotions. Justin could still tell that Brian was having a hard time and ran his hand over Brian's back.

Brian started to remove his shirt. He decided that maybe flirting again with Justin would distract him from everything else. He turned back to face him. "So, Justin, how about we shower together and …" He raised his eyebrows suggestively and smiled.

Justin got a slow grin on his face. "You never stop, do you?"

Brian grinned. "I'm never going to stop until I have you." He put his arms around the blond.

Justin said. "As flattered as I am at that statement, I don't think now is the time to fuck each other's brains out."

Brian looked shocked. "I think it's the _perfect_ time for a little distraction."

"Well, I don't. Not with Michael in the hospital and we're in _his_ house and we don't know if …"

"OK. I get it." Brian shrugged and moved away.

"If I join you in the shower it would be to support you and be with you, not … you know."

**Brian's POV**

_I want to fuck him, but I'm exhausted and my game in the bedroom would probably be less than stellar anyway. It's good to have him around. I don't want to be alone right now. I have a feeling that I'll have him soon enough. He wants me. If this beautiful young man is willing to share my shower with me, who am I to say 'no'? Even if nothing really happens – this time. _

**End POV**

Brian took his shirt off the rest of the way and tossed it aside. "Suit yourself. Whatever you want." He said with an enticing smile. He didn't want to press the issue. He entered the bathroom, started the shower, undressed and stepped inside.

**Justin's POV**

_He's very tempting. I'd love to get to know him better – to fuck him, but now isn't the time. God, he makes me so hot, though. I'd love to run my hands over his body and kiss him. I want to rub myself against him, make him hard and let him take me. Stop it, Taylor! Now's not the time. I'm still a little freaked out about the bombing. I just need to be with someone strong like him. _

**End POV**

Justin put the fresh clothes in Hunter's room, undressed and stepped into the shower. Brian was facing away and heard the younger man step behind him. Before he could turn around, though, Justin said, "I'll wash your back for you." He grabbed a washcloth and started to run it over Brian's back.

After some silent washing, Brian slowly turned around as the two men got a full view of each other. Their growing desire for each other was evident. He said, "It's all I can do to resist you."

"I appreciate that you're trying. Can I have some shampoo?"

"Sure. Let me …" Brian put some shampoo in his hand as Justin turned towards the shower's spray with his back to his tall friend. Brian began to scrub Justin's blond hair and watched as the soot and grime from the explosion was being washed away. _If only the memories could wash away._ They continued the rest of the shower in silence, just appreciating being with each other.

After they'd both washed up, Brian pressed his chest to Justin's back and kissed his neck. "When I fuck you, it's going to be _so_ good."

The blond could feel the other man's burgeoning hard on brush against his ass, tempting him even more. Justin decided that he had to break away before they both did something they'd regret. He smiled as he got an idea. He loosened himself from Brian's embrace, stepped out of the shower, and turned the dial to 'cold'.

"What the fuck!" Brian yelped as he turned off the water. "Why you little …" By the time he got out of the shower he saw Justin, towel in hand, streaking out of the bathroom towards Hunter's room. Brian gave chase, but his prey got to Hunter's door first and it was closed and locked preventing entry. "I'm going to get you for that."

Justin was laughing as he said, "I thought you needed to cool off a little."

"You come out here right now, twat!" Brian was irritated, but smiling at the same time.

"No dice, my friend. Not until you dry off and _cool_ off. Your clothes are in Michael's room. Go get dressed."

Justin snickered. He could hear Brian mumble swear words as his wet feet padded back to the master bedroom.

After a few minutes Justin was dressed and ventured forth from the bedroom. He tentatively approached the master bedroom. Brian was finishing dressing. As Justin entered the doorway there was a banging noise outside. He ran to Brian's arms.

"What was that?" Justin asked.

Brian peered out the window and looked in the alley. "It's just a garbage truck. Don't worry, it's OK."

Justin squeezed him tightly. "I guess I'm a little jumpy."

"Me, too." They stood and held each other for a while.

"I'm sorry about earlier, I just thought you needed it." Justin smiled mischievously.

"Oh, yeah … that." Brian pushed the blond backwards onto the bed and dove on top of him, pinning him down. He began ticking him. "You ticklish? Huh?" He didn't need any confirmation other than the squirming and laughing figure under him.

"Stop it! I can't … breathe!" Justin tried to retaliate or get away, but Brian was too strong for him.

Brian laughed and rolled to one side, releasing his prisoner. Justin caught his breath, still chuckling from his attack. His blue eyes sparkled from the laughter as a smile lit up his face. It was the most beautiful thing Brian could ever remember seeing. _Sunshine, indeed._ As Justin turned to face him, Brian put his hand on the side of the blond's face and kissed him. The kiss began slowly, and then turned more passionate. Finally, Justin pulled back and shook his head. "Can't."

"I couldn't resist." Brian smiled.

Justin stood up and ran his fingers through his hair. "So, are you sleeping here or the other room and are we going to be sleeping together or … what?" Brian stood up to face him. The garbage truck outside banged another dumpster in the alley and the guys held each other again.

Brian offered, "I think it might be good if we're with each other. Let's sleep in Hunter's bed. We'll leave this bed for Ben and Mikey after he gets home."

Justin nodded. Brian grabbed his cell phone. They walked down the hallway and climbed under the covers on Hunter's queen sized bed. Justin rolled to his side and spooned himself in behind Brian, his arm around his waist.

Brian sighed a ragged breath, the worry for Michael overcoming him again. A hidden tear ran down his cheek. "Thanks for staying with me." He kissed Justin's hand.

The blond kissed the back of his friend's shoulder. "It's OK. Everything's going to be OK." He closed his eyes. Nothing else was said and they both, eventually, drifted off to sleep.


	4. CHAPTER FOUR  BACK IN NEW YORK

Sunday, July 17, 2005

A few hours later, Ben called with the news that Michael was doing a little better and seemed to be turning a corner in his recovery. Brian thanked him and promised that he'd be back to the hospital soon. Justin said, "We'll _both_ be there."

Brian closed his cell phone and rolled toward Justin to take him in his arms again. "Did you get any sleep?"

"Yeah, I'm surprised. I guess I was pretty exhausted. You?"

"It took me a while to get to sleep, but, yeah, after that I was OK."

Justin sat up and stretched. "I can make us some breakfast."

Brian pulled him back down onto the bed and threw his leg over him. "I know what I'd like for breakfast." His hand stroked Justin's cock through the fabric of his pants.

Justin surprised him by rolling them over so he was on top. "Wouldn't it be best if the first time we're together … we're in either your bed or mine back home … no interruptions … no worries … hours to spend together and give pleasure to each other … my complete and utter submission to your will?"

"Mmmm. That sounds good."

The blond got up off of the bed. "Then, let's wait for that and not do anything in _any_ bed until then."

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Brian and Justin returned to the hospital. Michael was making progress and woke up for a short time, much to the relief of all present. Justin talked to Brian and Lindsay and told them that he had decided to catch an afternoon flight back to New York.

Brian cornered Justin in a hospital stairwell before his departure. "When I get back to New York, we can get together. Finally." He put his arms around the blond.

"I'm looking forward to it. You have no idea how much." Justin said.

Brian pressed their hips together, grinding their cocks. "I think I have an idea."

The young man moaned at the contact. "Stop it or we're going to get all dirty."

"That's the plan."

Justin snickered and moved Brian's hips away. "No, really. We'll continue this back in the big city. Until then …" They kissed and he walked away.

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Thursday, July 21, 2005

Justin's cell phone rang. "Hello."

"Hey, it's Brian."

"Hey, how's Michael?"

"Much better. He's in a regular room. They're keeping him for observation for a couple more days."

"That's great. Where are you now?"

"I'm back in New York. I was wondering if we could get together."

Justin smiled. "Sure. What do you have in mind? Or should I ask?"

"Heh, heh. I was thinking we could have dinner and then go back to my place."

"Sounds good. Where for dinner?"

"How about Fortunato's on 5th Avenue? Do you know it?"

"Yeah. A little out of _my_ price range, but, yeah."

"I'll pick up the tab, don't worry about it."

"Whoo hoo! I'm getting steak tonight!"

Brian laughed. "Whatever you want, Justin."

"What I want is, well, the steak, and then what comes after that at your place. Shall we call it dessert?"

"You can call it whatever the hell you want as long as you show up ready and willing."

"Trust me, Brian, I am." He sighed into the phone and moaned a little. "You're all I've been thinking about lately."

Brian could hear the desire in Justin's voice. It was getting him hot, too. "We could just meet up at my place first and …"

"No, you said dinner. Feed me first. I'm the starving artist, remember? If we go to your place first, I'll never get dinner. I know you _that_ well."

Brian smirked. "That you do. OK, so dinner at 7 o'clock? I'll make a reservation."

"Great."

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Brian and Justin met up at Fortunato's at seven o'clock. They kissed and hugged their hellos.

"You look hot." Brian said.

"You, too, handsome."

They had steak dinners and a couple of glasses of wine apiece. Justin happily told his friend that the painting that was featured at the gallery was purchased by an anonymous buyer. Brian picked up the check and then they took a cab over to his condo. Brian showed Justin around the condo.

Justin stopped in his tracks. "Hey, that's my painting! _You_ bought it?"

"Why, it appears as though I have." Brian answered smoothly.

"You didn't tell me."

"I wanted to surprise you."

"Why did you buy it?"

"I told you … I like it. The subject of the painting has captivated my interest, it seems."

Justin smiled at Brian and they kissed. The tour continued as they looked at Gus and JR's room, then the guest room.

"… For Lindsay and Mel, or Michael and Ben …"

"The next time they visit – _when_ they visit."

"Yes. _When_ they visit." Brian smiled.

"Did Ben ever go home to sleep?"

"Only when I forced him to and drove his ass there."

"He's very loyal to Mike."

"Yes. Yes, he is."

"That's a rare quality these days." Justin observed.

"Yeah. I'm appreciating more and more people who develop and maintain loyalty. Cynthia, my assistant, is loyal … followed me to New York. Even Ted. And you … helped me with Lindsay when she got hurt … followed us back to the Pitts … stayed with me at the house after Michael got hurt."

"Just helping my friends." Justin shrugged, and then looked up at Brian. "You are loyal to your friends. I admire that. It's endearing and, I know this might sound odd … sexy."

"Sexy, eh?" They kissed. "That brings us to the last stop on the tour – the master bedroom."

Justin smirked.

Brian, still the tour guide, continued. "It includes a king size platform bed, walk in shower, dressing area, walk in closet."

"Well, we've shared a shower before and I'm out of the closet, so, why don't we just proceed to the bed?"

They stood at the foot of the bed and kissed while they slowly unbuttoned each other's' shirts. When Justin's shirt was undone, Brian slid it from the young man's body and kissed his neck and shoulders. "So beautiful."

Justin moaned and closed his eyes. He was being transported by the gentle affections being shown him. As Brian began to kiss his sweet mouth again, Justin finished unbuttoning Brian's shirt. When the kiss ended, he smiled at his tall friend and slid his hands sensually across his bronzed body. The 'favor' of kisses was returned as he worked from Brian's neck to his navel. Licks and small bites were placed on his nipples. Brian leaned his head back with the sensations going through him, and then he started to unfasten his pants. Justin helped him complete that task. Soon the pants, shoes and socks were all removed from Brian's body.

They faced each other and their lips met yet again. Their hands roamed each other's bodies. Justin's hand ran over the front of Brian's boxer briefs. "You are so fucking hot. I can't wait to see all of you again."

Brian moaned and began unfastening Justin's pants. Before the blond knew what had happened, his pants were on the floor and hands roamed the surface of his briefs. Brian looked Justin in the eye and nodded toward the bed. As they reclined, they removed their underwear. They got a good look at each other and their lips met again in a passionate embrace. They kissed for some time as their hands roamed each other's bodies. As the kissing ended, Brian asked, "So, what do you like to do?" Brian wanted to test the extent of Justin's sexual experience.

"Do? In bed? I'm up for anything you are." Brian approved of that response.

"Oh, I'm up all right… Do you like to rim?"

"Sure. I love it."

"Then go to it."

Justin smiled and sat up, gently pushing Brian onto his stomach. He began a trail of kisses down his lover's back, alternately kissing and licking from the back of his neck to the crack of his ass. He spread Brian's cheeks with his hands and positioned himself for the best access, and then began rimming him. His tongue expertly licked and twirled around Brian's opening. Then he rolled his tongue and dove in, tongue fucking his lover's musky depths. Brian moved his legs farther apart and angled his hips so that Justin could enter him as much as possible, moaning in the process. He'd been rimmed before, but, the way the blond was doing it, it was like it was his last delicious meal. It was quite possibly the best rim job he'd had.

Finally, Brian felt the excitement building too high and had to stop his lover's ministrations. "Stop. Unnngh. Enough."

Justin smiled and got to his knees. He wiped his face with his hand and sucked on his own fingers sensually. "You like?"

Brian rolled to his back and smiled. "You are full of surprises, Sunshine." He, too, got to his knees and they exchanged more tongue dueling kisses, sharing the taste. "Now your turn. On your back."

Justin lay down on his back and Brian threw his leg over him so that he was sitting backwards on the blond's stomach. Brian moved his lover's legs up to expose as much of his ass as possible. When he bent over to rim him, Justin got a full view of Brian's spit slicked crack. Justin tugged slightly on his lover's thighs to get Brian's cock in reach of his mouth and took him all in, to the appreciative groans of his lover. They continued this way for some time. Then Brian swung his leg back over to lay down facing Justin again. Brian's fingers probed the slicked opening.

It was almost more stimulation than Justin could handle. "Stop. I don't want to come until you're inside me. I need you _now_. Fuck me. Make love to me." He said.

Brian was a little taken aback at the mention of making love. No one had ever asked that of him before. It was always just about the fucking. But, he knew that this was different with Justin. Their considerable foreplay with rimming and kissing was something he'd never really done before, not _before_ sex. Maybe this _was_ more than just fucking.

He retrieved a condom and some lubricant. He put on the condom and, during a further kissing session, began preparing Justin with the lube. "I've wanted to be with you for days, ever since I first saw you. There seemed to be so many things keeping us from getting together."

"I know. I've wanted you, too."

"Do you want me now?"

"Yes."

"Do you want my stiff cock in your ass?"

"Oh, yeah."

"Do you want me to slam into until you come?"

"Do it, right the fuck now."

Brian moved Justin's legs up until his knees were in the crook of Brian's elbows. His cock was in position and he took one final look into the blond's face. Justin nodded and licked his lips. Brian pushed himself inside slowly and deliberately, causing Justin to wince at first. Once Brian was firmly embedded he began thrusting in a steady rhythm. The excitement took over and they were feeling all of the pleasure that they had been anticipating for days. Their bodies moved together in a symphony of kisses, thrusts and groans of pleasure.

They continued for several minutes, their passions building. They repositioned to lying on their sides and found pleasure in that position, too. Then, Justin rolled to his stomach and Brian topped him there, with more aggressive moves possible that way. Finally, Brian knew they were both close, so they went back to their original position; Justin on his back and Brian facing him.

In each new position Brian quietly sung the praises of Justin. "So perfect. You're so tight. I'm going to come so hard." He knew he was saying these things out loud, but he couldn't stop. Justin _was_ perfect and tight.

Justin had a feeling that Brian rarely shared his feelings, much less complimenting someone sexually, and he silently and excitedly accepted each one.

The pressure and pleasure had built so much that neither of them could hold back any longer. Justin stroked his cock and drove himself to an intensely vocal orgasm. Brian was feeling things he'd never felt before, being inside this incredible blond, and couldn't hold his shouts of ecstasy either. "Fuck! Justin!" Brian yelled as he exploded into the condom. He collapsed on top of Justin, their sweat mingling with his cum between them.

Brian said breathlessly, "That was a-mazing!" He kissed his lover's neck and began kissing his mouth. _One of the best fucks of my life._

As they ended a kiss, Justin said, "Unbelievable. I didn't want it to stop."

"Oh, we're just getting started, Sunshine. There will be more rounds to go before we sleep. How about the shower for round two? I've wanted to fuck you in a shower ever since we didn't get the opportunity back at Michael's."

Justin smiled and nodded. Brian pulled out and disposed of the condom. They walked to the bathroom and stepped into a steamy shower. Kissing and fondling began anew as they familiarized themselves even more with each other's bodies. Brian put on a condom and moved Justin up against the wall of the shower. After fingering him with a soapy digit, he penetrated the blond's tight hole and the fucking started again. Brian bit at his lover's neck and then lavished it with kisses. Justin leaned back and kissed Brian, then leaned forward so that his lover could embed himself fully in his ass. It wasn't long before they both achieved another intense orgasm, yelling out to each other.

The rest of the evening continued with many encounters in various positions. Brian was pleasantly surprised at Justin's enthusiastic approach to sex. He could keep up with all of the actions and match Brian's moves in every way. And the way that Justin moaned and vocalized was, in itself, enough to get him off. Brian was glad that they'd waited until they were alone in his bed for their first time because it allowed them the freedom to take their time and make as much noise as they wanted to.

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Friday, July 22, 2005

Brian's alarm went off at eight in the morning. He looked over at Justin sleeping peacefully. _What a beautiful sight._ He began to kiss Justin until he was awake. When the blue eyes finally opened the young man said, "Good morning. What a nice way to wake up."

"Good morning to you, too. Did you sleep OK?"

"Considering that we, um, finished at around three this morning and it's what …?"

"Eight a.m."

"…It's eight a.m., yeah, I feel great." They kissed. "Do you have to work today?"

Brian sighed. "Yes. I've taken a few days off with everything that happened. I _have_ to go back today. Although I can also think of all of the reasons that I want to stay here in bed with you." His erection brushed against the young man's body.

Justin rolled them until he was on top of Brian. "How about I just give you a sendoff and something to remember me by?" Brian grinned as the blond gave him a series of kisses down his body and began a hot and heavy blow job. Justin's cheeks sucked in as he moved his head up and down. He alternated those actions with licking the underside of Brian's cock and sucking on his balls, the latter of which seemed to be very effective in driving his lover crazy. After a few minutes of Brian's moaning and writhing, he came down Justin's throat with a juicy load of cum.

A trail of Justin's kisses led back up the panting figure as Brian recovered from his euphoric high.

Brian said, "That was incredible. Did you learn that in college, little boy? I must say your education was well worth it."

Justin smiled, "I picked up a little in college. But I like to think that I'm constantly learning. You might have taught me some last night. You're not so bad at that yourself."

"I'm the best and don't forget it."

"And such a fragile ego, too. Hmmm. Well, anyway, that was my little gift to you. I know you have to run."

Brian got up out of bed and pulled Justin to his feet and took him into his arms. "Not before I return the favor in the shower."

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One quick but passionate shower session later, the guys were dressing.

Brian said, "So, what are you doing later?"

Justin was slipping into his shoes as he said, "I have to visit the gallery and then go to work." He froze for a second and said, "Why, are you asking me out again?"

Brian shrugged. "I was just curious."

The blond walked up to him and put his hand on Brian's chin. "I thought you had a no repeats rule, Brian fucking Kinney, Mr. Stud of Liberty Avenue."

"My only rule is that I make my own rules with no apologies and no regrets." They kissed. "I don't regret having you spend the night last night and I don't apologize for wanting to do it again. Soon. Very soon."

Justin could see passion in Brian's eyes and something more. He knew that there was more going on between them than just sex. Maybe it was because they had started and stopped so many times in the last few days, but he felt there was more to it than that. They truly enjoyed each other's company and cared about each other. He could feel himself falling for Brian.

Justin nodded. "Call me later and we can see each other again. I'd like that."

Brian pulled him tighter and kissed him gently, almost reverently. Then tongues came into play and the kiss deepened. Justin knew that he needed to go; otherwise they'd make Brian _really_ late to work.

"Later." Justin moved to the door.

"Later." Brian smiled and gave his new friend one last kiss as they parted ways.


	5. CHAPTER FIVE  A NEW ROMANCE

Brian set up an interview for Justin with Alex, the head of the art department at Kennedy and Collins. Brian knew that Justin was concerned about working an eight hour day and still having enough time to paint. In a conversation with Alex before Justin's interview, Brian suggested that if Alex wanted to hire the young man, Justin could work part time from eight a.m. until one in the afternoon. That way the art department would be covered during lunch time. Brian hated walking into that department and finding no one there, especially when a deadline was looming.

Justin brought in his portfolio, college transcripts and a letter of recommendation from Lindsay. Alex was very impressed and hired him on the spot once they negotiated the part time deal. Justin was pleased that he'd still have time for his paintings. He'd work through lunch keeping things moving during that time.

Brian was happy to have Justin around. They kept their professional life just that. Justin didn't want to risk the steady income of his new job. Brian learned his lesson years before with a fellow employee named Kip. They'd had consensual sex in Brian's office. Kip said later in a lawsuit that he'd only done that because Brian had pressured him to do so. Mel used the 'fuck anything lifestyle' defense and Brian got off with a fine, but that was enough of a lesson for him.

Working in the art department was another education for Justin and he appreciated the experience. It sure beat busing tables at the restaurant with Janice. Brian and Justin had a regular visit most mornings in the coffee break room. When no one else was around, they'd flirt a little, but nothing more than that. Justin would tease him by calling him 'Mr. Kinney', which he knew was a turn-on to his dark haired lover. It was often met with, "I'll get you for that later, Taylor." But, past all of the flirting, a real friendship was blooming. They truly enjoyed talking to each other and spending time together.

Justin also worked four or five hours on weekends at the Ashburn gallery where he'd shown his first piece. He would occasionally repaint a wall or sweep the floors, routine maintenance type work. It kept him on good graces with Mr. Ashburn and put a few extra dollars in his pocket. It certainly wasn't unheard of for new "starving" artists, with actual talent and experience, to work in the galleries in which their work was displayed.

For the next few months, Brian and Justin went out once or twice a week. Brian introduced him to all of the best gay dance clubs, including their favorite, _Stefan's_. The beat there was always pounding and hot guys were plentiful. Justin knew about Brian's reputation for seducing men, and on a few separate occasions while they were out the 'stud of Liberty Avenue' took a trick into the back room. Seeing Brian disappear with some guy didn't really shock Justin or bother him. He, too, enjoyed the attentions of other dance partners and took a few trips to the backroom himself. At the end of the evening, though, Brian and Justin would return to the condo and work out any other sexual tensions with each other. Their lives weren't in any kind of predictable pattern, but it _did_ seem that about once a week, Justin would spend the night at Brian's condo.

Brian's work buddies, Greg and Jerry, quickly adopted Justin into their little group. They liked the way the young man would stand his ground in arguments over the effectiveness of an advertising design. He could also keep up with conversation and offer his own dose of sarcasm, when needed.

Justin knew that he was in love with Brian. This was stronger than any emotion he had felt for Ethan or any other guy he'd ever dated. He didn't want to tell Brian that he was in love with him though, because he was afraid it would spook him and cause a strain in their relationship. It might even scare Brian into breaking up with him. Justin knew he wasn't ready to hear those words yet. Maybe he'd tell him sometime in the future when they were closer.

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One night, though, after watching a romantic movie at the condo, Brian surprised Justin by bringing up the subject of love. He took a drag on his cigarette. "You said you were in love with Ian, right?"

"Ethan."

"Right, Ethan. You loved him?"

"Yes. I believed I really loved him. It was my first love – possibly a crush, but at the time I thought it was more than that."

"What was it like? How did it make you feel?"

"Well, let's see. I thought about him all of the time. I'd miss him terribly when we were apart."

"Mmmm, hmm. Go on."

"Are you taking notes or something?"

"Just curious."

"Ohhh K. Um, well, when we'd kiss I couldn't resist him. Electricity would run through me. We fucked a lot. I couldn't stop thinking about him. I was happiest when I was with him. I didn't want to be with anyone else. I couldn't imagine my life without him."

Brian smiled slightly uneasily, "OK. I'm getting the picture."

"You're sure you've never been in love?"

"I'm sure." He leaned up on one elbow and looked intently at Justin. "But, things change. Who can predict what the fates will bring?"

Justin smirked. "I will add though, that after all this time and realizing how fast it did end, maybe it wasn't love, but more lust. It certainly felt like love at the time, it's hard to tell when it's your first love. When Ethan messed up, though, I was so pissed that I left him. We didn't really talk after that and I moved out and got over him pretty fast. I know what love feels like now, though. Real love wouldn't break up over one person or another messing up. It can be wonderful and painful, and no matter what, if you really love each other, then anything can be worked out."

He looked over at Brian, their eyes meeting and exchanging looks that seemed to say something that neither was ready to say, certainly things that Brian didn't want to say or admit to feeling.

Brian narrowed his eyes, "Wipe that smile off of your face, twat."

"So, does any of this ring true for you?"

"I'll let you know." Brian got up to take a shower.

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October 31, 2005

The Halloween party at Stefan's was a real blow out. Justin dressed up with a cowboy hat and fringed vest. Brian just wore all black leather for the 'leather daddy' look. It was as close as he'd ever come to a costume. At this point in their relationship, they had stopped seeking out affirmation in the back room with other men. However, Justin caught some hot fellow with fireman's pants and suspenders, nothing else, giving Brian the eye.

"If you want to have him slide down your pole, go ahead." Justin wanted to give his lover some space.

"Nah, I've pretty much given up such pursuits."

"Really?"

"The only guy I want to _ride_ tonight is a certain cowboy."

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Thursday, November 24, 2005

At Thanksgiving, Brian and Justin decided to fly together back to Pittsburgh to spend time with family and friends. Debbie insisted that they both come to her house for another overabundance-of-food dinner. She watched Brian and 'Sunshine' together and smiled at their small affections toward each other. She was happy for Brian. He'd had such a rough youth and never seemed to open his heart to anyone, but Justin had somehow gotten in under his thick shell. _Good for him_, she thought_. _She made sure to take a photo of them together with Brian's cell phone.Later that weekend Brian went on to Toronto to visit Gus and Lindsay. Justin stayed with his mother and sister, and then flew back to New York.

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Early December 2005

Christmas was now fast approaching. When Justin brought up the subject of possibly exchanging presents with Brian, he made a flippant comment about just getting some new sex toys for each other. Justin knew, though, he couldn't let the holiday go by without getting one special (non-sexual) item for Brian. He spied several things in the designer stores that he was sure that Brian would like, but he could almost hear his lover's voice in his head saying that he'd spent too much money and didn't need to, etc. Justin settled on doing a painting of the Diner, which, to them, symbolized gay Pittsburgh. After all, it was a place that they'd both gone to back home. It was funny to him how they'd never met, but, then again, Justin had only been there a handful of times. The painting was a visual reminder of home and kind of a nod to the fact that even though it was a place they both came from; the fates didn't bring them together until they were both in New York.

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Tuesday, December 20, 2005

Brian flew to Toronto to give Gus his presents, including some kids' drawing supplies from 'Uncle Justin'. At the same time, Justin visited Pittsburgh. Brian and Justin made plans to have their own Christmas celebration once they were back in New York.

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Monday, December 26, 2005

The day before Justin was going to fly back to New York, Brian surprised him and the gang by flying into Pittsburgh and meeting up with them at the Diner around dinner time. He had small gifts for everyone.

He pulled Justin aside, "I got a nice room at the W hotel downtown. Care to come back to my room with me, little boy, so I can lead you astray?"

"Why, Mr. Kinney, I don't know." Justin gave his Sunshine grin. "I'd love it!" They kissed and hugged.

Emmett talked to Deb as she poured his coffee. "Have you ever seen Brian like that with anyone? I do believe that our boy is in love."

"I think you're right." Deb agreed.

Ben smiled and nodded in agreement. Michael looked a little sad, but then brightened. "You know, he deserves it. When I first met Justin, I warned him that Brian didn't do boyfriends, but the kid proved me wrong."

Emmett said, "Just don't tell Brian he has a boyfriend."

Michael smiled and nodded.

Ben said, "I hope they're as happy as we are, Michael."

"Me too, Ben. Me, too."

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Tuesday, December 27, 2005

Brian invited Justin to his condo so they could have their own private recognition of the Christmas holiday. Brian had joked about 'toys' for Christmas, but he decided that he couldn't let the holiday pass without getting something special for the man in his life. Justin meant too much to him. Brian found a leather coat with a removable lining at the Hugo Boss store. It would be the perfect thing for his young friend who could never seem to afford more than a cloth coat or raincoat to face New York's sometimes nasty weather.

Justin showed up at Brian's door with his painting under his arm. They shared a bottle of wine and talked about their travels of the previous days. Brian gave Justin his gift first and the blond's breath was taken away at the extravagant leather coat. "Brian, this is so … wonderful … and expensive! Thank you so much."

"Put it on. Try it out." Brian said. Justin did and it fit him perfectly. The young man went to look in the full length mirror. "You look so …"

"What?"

"Beautiful."

Justin lavished his love with kisses and promised to model the coat again later with nothing else on. As he put his hands in the pockets, he discovered something. It was a key. "What's this?"

"I want you to have a key to the condo, so you can come and go as you please. It's just so darn inconvenient to have to rush to let you in when we're meeting here. I hate finding you standing in the hallway when you beat me here."

The blond smiled. Brian was trying to make out like giving him a key wasn't a big deal, but it was. Allowing Justin into his private domain any time he wanted to was an important step for Brian. "Thank you, Brian. This is … thank you."

Then he gave Brian the painting. As it was uncovered, Brian got a slow grin on his face. "Wow, the Liberty Diner! It's never looked better. I'll have to find a place to put this up. Maybe the kitchen, eh?"

Justin smiled and accepted a thank you kiss. He looked wistfully at the Diner. "It's still funny to me how we both came from there and never met."

"I wasn't ready for anyone else in my life when I lived there. I can only imagine the soap opera that would have gone on if you'd met me and decided you liked me a few years ago. I would have just kept pushing you away and making our lives a living hell. It's better this way."

Justin said, "Michael told me that you'd say 'I don't believe in love. I believe in fucking.' Is that true?"

"It's honest. It's efficient." Brian carried the painting into the kitchen and held it up to find the best spot for it.

Justin followed. "You still don't believe in love?"

"Love is something straight people tell themselves they are in so that they can get laid. And then they end up hurting each other because it was all based on lies to begin with."

"Some people really can be in love, Brian. Michael and Ben love each other."

"Yes, I guess so."

"Ethan and I loved each other."

Brian smirked, "And see how well that turned out?" He got out a hammer and a picture hanging hook from the utility drawer.

"Yeah, but _he_ ruined that." Justin thought for a moment. "He was the first one to say 'I love you' to me. And come to think of it, I don't think I ever said it back."

"It's just something that I won't say."

"Won't say or can't say?"

"Can't implies that I'm incapable. I won't say it because … I don't believe in it." Brian tapped the hook into the wall.

"Would you believe me if I told you I loved you?"

Brian turned and looked at Justin with one eyebrow raised. He hadn't anticipated that from his young lover.

Justin continued, "I know you will probably never say it, but I want you to know that I love you."

"Justin, I …" Brian returned the hammer to the drawer.

"It's OK. You don't have to say anything." The young man looked down.

Brian put his hand under Justin's chin and brought his eyes up to meet his. "I care _very_ much."

They kissed, tenderly at first, and then with more passion. Brian smiled and put the painting on the hook. He smiled and reached for Justin's hand. "Let's go to the bedroom and I'll show you _how_ much."


	6. CHAPTER SIX  AN ANNIVERSARY MISSED

Friday, January 13, 2006

Brian was getting ready to leave after a day at work. Greg and Jerry walked into his office.

Greg said, "Hey, Brian. We're going out for a drink to celebrate the new account. Wanna come?"

Brian looked up and shook his head. "I can't. I told Justin I'd take him out tonight."

"So, do it some other night." Jerry said.

"It's the six month anniversary of the day we met." Brian said.

Greg turned to Jerry. "Awww. Isn't that cute, Jerry? It's their anniversary."

Brian scowled, "Fuck you guys."

"Well, if you have to spend the night with 'the wife'…" Jerry shrugged.

"Justin isn't _the wife_. Knock it off."

"Whatever, Brian. Suit yourself. Just going for drinks."

Brian could tell if he didn't go for a drink with the guys they were going to assume that Justin had his balls in a jar at home. He'd already had one removed; he didn't want them accusing him of letting Justin removing the other. "Well, I suppose one drink couldn't hurt."

"That a way, Brian!" Greg was glad that he'd changed his mind.

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They went to a local bar that had all kinds of folks; gay and straight, young and old. The three ad men got a table and knocked back shots and beers. Brian texted Justin to tell him he was out and that he'd call later. More rounds were purchased and soon Brian was feeling no pain. He flirted with the bartender, Rick, for a couple of hours. After Rick got off of work, Brian met up with him and took him back to his condo.

**Brian's POV**

_I will not become some guy that's so whipped I can't fuck around a little. The guys were giving me shit and I won't take it. I'll fuck who I want, when I want. Justin can't tell me what to do._

**End POV**

Brian and Rick went at it for over an hour. Rick wanted to top, but Brian wasn't having any of that. After the second round ended at 3 a.m., Rick pushed Brian to his stomach and tried to force himself on him.

"What the fuck do you think you're doing?"

Rick growled, "My turn to top."

Brian rolled to one side and jumped up. "Get the fuck out of here!"

"What?"

"You heard me, I said GET THE FUCK OUT!"

"Asshole. Fine. I'll get my shit and go."

Rick threw his pants on. Brian walked to the front door and threw Rick's shoes out into the hallway. Rick soon followed. Brian slammed the door. His head was reeling from the alcohol. He didn't enjoy being with Rick as much as he thought he would. He looked at the answering machine with the message light blinking and realized that he'd never called Justin back. It was too late to call him.

"I'll call him in the morning." He muttered to himself and then collapsed onto the bed.

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Saturday, January 14, 2006

Justin arrived at the condo at 10 am. He had tried calling on the phone and knocking on the door to the condo, but received no answer. He let himself in.

"Brian? Are you OK? I was worried about you. Brian?"

Brian awoke to the sound of Justin's voice. Just as his young friend walked into the bedroom Brian shoved the condom wrappers, used condoms and a cum towel off of the opposite side of the bed. "Hey."

Justin didn't notice Brian's actions. "Hi. Thank God you're OK. I was worried. You didn't call." He was relieved to find him OK and alone.

"Are you checking up on me?"

"I just wanted to make sure you're all right."

Brian sat up on the side of the bed naked and held his head. "I had a few last night and came back here and crashed." He looked at Justin. "I guess I didn't call you."

"That's OK." Justin shrugged. "Like you said, you don't have to check in with me."

Brian stood up. Justin moved to kiss him, but Brian turned away. "I need to brush my teeth and clean up, OK?" _I don't want him to smell anyone else on me._ He kissed Justin's forehead.

"OK. I'll wait. Maybe I can make you some coffee?"

"That would be grand. I've got a splitting headache."

"OK. Go ahead."

Brian entered the shower and turned on the water. Justin decided to straighten the bed because it was a rumpled mess. As he walked around the bed to smooth the covers he stepped on something on the floor. His heart sank when he found empty condom wrappers and used condoms. The cum towel on the floor had obviously also been used.

_I thought he was done fucking around._

Justin used a tissue over his hand to arrange the towel and condom leavings on the foot of the bed. As Brian exited the bedroom with a towel wrapped around him, he saw his young blond friend sitting in a chair staring at the … evidence.

_Fuck. He found that shit. _

Justin just stared at the bed. "Apparently there was more to last night than having a few and crashing."

"Oh, that."

"Yeah THAT!" Justin ran his hands through his hair. "Jesus, Brian. I thought you were done fucking around."

Brian's blood heated up. _He is not going to get away with talking to me like that. I will not be 'whipped' by him. _"Who the fuck are you to tell me what I can or cannot do?"

Justin looked blankly at Brian. "You're right. Just you being you. I know who you are. I can't expect you to change." He smiled weakly. "Maybe I just wanted you to." He walked out of the bedroom and headed toward the front door.

Brian started to realize that the blond that blew into his life and made him feel … something … for the first time in his life – was about to blow out of his life.

"Justin, wait." He wanted to explain. "He didn't mean anything to me. It was just a fuck."

Justin had his hand on the doorknob. "I just came by to make sure you're OK. You're obviously your usual fabulous self, so I can go. You don't have to explain yourself. I was going to paint today anyway."

Brian spun him around to face him and placed his hands on the young man's shoulders. "I still owe you a dinner."

"To commemorate what? What do we have to celebrate anyway?" Justin pulled away from him and left the condo.

As Brian watched him walk away, he closed the door, and then rested his head against it.

_Fuck. What have I done? Damn it. _

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Justin immediately went to the restaurant where Janice worked as a waitress. She was setting up for the lunch crowd.

"Hey, Justin. What's up? Is Brian OK? I know you were worried about him."

He leaned up against the counter with his arms crossed. "Yeah, I found him at home."

Janice could read him well. "Uh oh, what happened?"

Justin told her the whole story, what was found, who said what. "I'm just so pissed right now."

She said, "You have to figure out what he means to you and if you want to keep seeing him."

He sighed, "Yes, I want to keep seeing him. I just wish that he'd stop fooling around with other guys. I just wish we could get to another level in our relationship."

"I think what's important now is how to treat him the next time you see him. If you come off as the possessive boyfriend you'll lose him."

"Yeah, probably."

Janice straightened up and looked squarely at him. "So, I'm Brian and I see you and I say '_I'm sorry, Justin_.'"

"He'd never do that. 'No apologies, no regrets.'"

She leaned her head back, thinking of another scenario. "OK, so he says '_Meet me at Stefan's. I'll buy you a drink_.'"

Justin considered this role playing game and what he'd say. "Sure, Brian. But, we need to talk."

Janice, impersonating Brian's low voice, said, "What's up, Sunshine?"

He smiled at Janice's impression of his boyfriend, and then he considered what he'd say next. "I want to know where this is going. Are you my boyfriend or maybe my partner? Are we exclusive? Are we going to live together?" He took Janice into his arms as if he was going to kiss her. "I love you and I want to know what's next for us."

Just as he was saying the last part, Carlo, the restaurant manager walked by and gave a bewildered look. "Hey, Justin. You, uh, you and Janice …" He shook his head. "I'll never have you gay boys figured out."

Janice and Justin snickered as the mystified Carlo walked away. She held Justin at arm's length. "Well, you convinced me, and Carlo, so now you're ready to talk to Brian."

"Yeah, thanks. Now we'll see _when_ that is."

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Debbie phoned Brian that afternoon to tell him that she was going to throw Michael a birthday party at the end of the month. "How are you, Brian?"

"Ehhh. OK."

"What's wrong, honey?"

"I fucked a bartender last night at my place. Justin dropped by this morning and …"

"Jesus, he didn't find you in bed with the guy did he?"

"No, but let's just say the evidence of the encounter was there."

"Was Justin pissed?"

"Yeah, mostly because he thought I gave up other men."

"Did you?"

"Apparently not."

"Why the fuck not?"

"I'm not some pseudo-hetero monogamous queen like Mikey. That's not who I am."

"But you care about Justin."

"Yeah."

"You love him don't you?"

Brian just sighed into the phone.

"I thought so. You can fool the others and even yourself, but you can't fool me. I've known you for too long. You have to decide if you want to spend the rest of your life scoring with faceless men, or maybe, just maybe, find the one man who will make your life complete."

Brian snorted his derision.

"Don't snort at me, young man. Not even such a young man anymore. You're 35 for chrissake! That's still young, but old enough to know better. Have you ever met anyone that you care for as much as Justin?"

"Yeah, Ma. I've instantly fallen in love with that bartender from last night. He's my soul mate."

"Yeah? What's his name?"

"Rick or Dick. I'm not sure."

Deb sighed. "Brian, I think you have to go out and get Sunshine back. Go find him and apologize, and don't tell me 'no apologies', either."

"I don't have anything to apologize for."

"If Justin was upset that you couldn't keep your dick in your pants then he probably had a good reason to think you would. He's the best fucking thing that's happened to you, and don't deny it. You need to find him."

Brian sighed, knowing she was right, but still not willing to admit it out loud. "I don't even know if he'll talk to me."

"He cares about you, Brian. I've seen the look in his eyes, too. He adores you."

"Yeah, I guess."

"You guess? How long have you known him now?"

"Six months."

"That's a record for you. Usually, it's six _hours_, tops."

Brian chuckled and then thought a minute. "So, what can I do?"

Deb considered her response. "Do something for him, something you don't do for anyone else … something big like flowers or something."

"I'm not some fucking lesbian."

"Gay, lesbian, straight, bi, it doesn't matter, you're human and you have feelings. If you want to get him back, then do something beyond your usual."

Brian just sighed into the phone. He wasn't going to fight with her.

"You'll get him back and you'll bring him to Michael's party, OK?"

"Yeah, fine."

"Good. It'll work out, you'll see."

"Because you said so?"

"Damn straight … Listen, I have to go. My shift starts in a few minutes. Take care."

"Bye, Ma." They hung up.

**Brian's POV**

_Always with the motherly advice, that one. Not that I mind it right now. It's more than I'd get from my own mother, 'Saint Joan', that's for sure. I suppose she's right - that I'm going to go outside my comfort zone to get Justin back. He's the only guy I've ever cared enough about to consider spending the rest of my life with. If I'm going to stick to only one man, who better to spend my time with than the greatest lay I've ever had? I have to get him back. _

**End POV**


	7. CHAPTER 7  SOMETHING TO REMEMBER ME BY

Sunday, January 15, 2006

Justin was still upset from the day before, but he couldn't deny that he still loved Brian. He was wondering for the hundredth time that day what Brian's next move would be, when the ad exec breezed into the gallery wearing his best dark jeans and a leather jacket. He had a shopping bag with him.

Brian smiled. "Hey."

"Hey. What brings you here?"

"I wanted to talk to you. I have something for you."

"Let's go into the office."

They walked into the office and Justin closed the door. He had his arms folded across his chest. "What?"

Brian handed him a small photo album. "I downloaded photos from my phone and printed them. It includes a bunch of the stuff that you and I have done in the last six months. Oh, and this is for you." He reached into the bag and pulled out a small bouquet of six roses. He wasn't ever the flowers kind of guy before, but this was Justin. Plus, these weren't your normal hetero 'I'm sorry' flowers. They were six different colors to appeal to Justin's inner artist.

"They're beautiful, Brian. Thank you."

Brian smiled tentatively. "One rose for every month we've been together." He opened the album. "Here's a print from that beer campaign that you helped me with when we met. Here we are at the Diner in Pittsburgh. Oh, I like this one, posing with that goofy waiter from Fortunato's. Anyway, I just wanted you to have something …" His voice trailed off and he shrugged a shoulder.

"What? Something to remember you by? Brian, it's not over. I was just pissed, OK? But, I've been thinking about it. I can't expect you to stop your wicked ways. We don't live together. I can't …"

"I want that to change."

"What to change?"

"I want you to move in with me. Live at the condo with me." He held Justin's hands. "I've been thinking about it and I think it's time. If you're living with me, maybe I won't fuck up … or at least not as much. I won't bring anyone back to the condo again. I know I only want you from now on in our bed."

"_Our_ bed?"

"That's what it'll be from now on. If you'll say _yes_." He closed his eyes to gather his thoughts and then opened them before he spoke again. "It's not like we're married. It's not like your parents. We'll have our own lives, jobs, and friends. But at the end of the day I want to come home to you."

Justin's blue eyes scanned Brian's face for sincerity and could see it in the hazel eyes looking hopefully at him. He'd never spoken to him like this before and was surprised. Pleasantly surprised.

"I would love to live with you."

They kissed and hugged. Brian was relieved that his young lover was back in his arms, and his life, again. Justin was surprised that Brian wanted to share his life and his private space with him.

Brian said, "Bring some things to the condo tonight and in the next few days we can move the rest of it. OK?"

"OK."

"I have to take a client to a Yankee's game. So, I'll see you later? I'll be home …" He smiled. "I'll be _home_ around six."

Justin smiled, too, at the use of the word home. "I'll try to be there around then, too, but it might be closer to seven."

"I'll have dinner and we can celebrate."

"No other guys?"

Brian shook his head and gave a rueful grin. "No, no other guys. I'm trying to cut back, remember?"

Justin smiled and nodded. "See you later, then."

Brian kissed Justin tenderly. "Later."

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At a quarter 'til seven, Brian was at the condo setting the table when he heard a knock at the door, followed by a key in the lock. Justin appeared in the doorway with a duffel bag, suitcase, and the roses Brian had given him earlier.

"Hey, come in. Let me help you with that stuff."

"Thanks."

They set the bags in the entryway. Brian reached to Justin for a hug and they kissed. "Welcome home."

"It's good to be here. Mmmm, something smells good. What's for dinner?"

"I bought a heat and eat lasagna from the local Italian deli."

"Well, we'd better eat fast if you're going to get all of your carbs out of the way. Isn't that your rule? 'No carbs after seven'?"

Brian smiled. _This guy knows me well._ "Usually that's the rule. It seems that I'm breaking more than one rule for you, Justin." They kissed. "Tell ya what, get the lasagna out of the oven and I'll put your bags in the bedroom, OK?"

"Sure."

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Less than an hour later, dinner was finished and the dishes were done. Brian was finding that sharing this domestic scene with Justin was not at all unpleasant. _Maybe I __can__ do this._

They proceeded to the bedroom and stripped, then stepped into the shower. Brian finished up first and toweled off. While Justin was completing his shower, Brian prepared the bedroom for a romantic scene. As Justin entered the bedroom he was overcome with what he saw. His lover had lit dozens of candles all over the room, which flickered with a warm glow. Justin's six roses were in a vase on his side of the bed and two glasses of wine were poured. Brian was in the middle of the bed wearing nothing but a smile.

"This is beautiful, Brian. You are unbelievable. I didn't think you knew romance until today."

"Oh, I knew how to do it, I just chose not to. But, today is a special occasion." Justin crawled into the bed and they clinked their glasses of wine together. "To starting the New Year together and wondrous days ahead."

"To days ahead." They sipped and then set their glasses down.

Justin leaned in to kiss Brian's sweet lips. God, how he loved that amazingly soft and sweet mouth. And the things that mouth could do to Justin's body.

Brian wanted nothing more than to pull Justin to him fast, flip him over and pound into that sweet, tight ass, but this wasn't that kind of night. Tonight was for … dare he think it … for making love. Just like the blond had asked of him their first night together in this bed. _'Make love to me'_ he'd said, and Brian could never forget. He wanted to show Justin what he meant to him; more than any trick had ever meant. Justin was no trick, never had been.

Brian reached over to caress Justin's cheek, and leaned in to kiss him even harder. What was it about kissing Justin? Those raspberry lips were absolutely delectable and he couldn't get enough of them. At this moment, he didn't think he'd _ever_ get enough of them. _Maybe if I have Justin to come home to every night I won't have the energy for, or even want, anyone else._

Justin moaned into the softest, sweetest kiss Brian had ever given to him. He could somehow read exactly what Brian wanted to say, but couldn't. They gasped into each other's mouths as Brian laid back and Justin laid on top of him. They were grinding their hips together, not hard, but enough to relieve the pressure of their cocks rubbing together.

Brian couldn't help but get lost in the sensations of Justin's tongue, lips, hands and cock. They were chest to chest and groin to groin. Unknowingly or without thinking, Brian's legs spread to accommodate the sexy blond on top of him, unaware of the signal that might send.

Justin broke the kiss and smiled as he licked Brian's ear. "Are you telling me that you want me to top?" It was beyond what he thought Brian was ready for, but, from their position it seemed it might be so.

Brian's body stiffened as he realized their position and how his lover could have misunderstood. He flashed back to the night before when Rick (Dick?) tried to force himself on him. He knew this question from Justin was not the same as that, not by a long shot. But it was still topping and Brian just couldn't.

Justin saw the look in Brian's eyes, and realized that he'd misinterpreted what was happening. "It's OK, Brian, if you don't want to."

_How to address this and not sound rude or hurting Justin's feelings?_ "It's not that… I mean…" He sighed. "I'm not ready for that right now."

Justin could see how hard this was for Brian; he could read his emotions in his eyes. It wasn't about trust and it certainly wasn't about Justin. This was Brian dealing with giving up control. Justin smiled his soft and sweet 'I love you' smile. "Brian. It's OK." He said gently, while cupping his lover's face in his hands. Brian closed his eyes. Justin brought Brian's face back to his, and waited patiently till he opened his eyes.

Brian was having a hard time, thinking that he'd somehow disappointed Justin. _Great way to fuck up, yet again, Kinney._ As he opened his eyes to look at Justin he saw the pure love and devotion in those brilliantly deep blue eyes staring back at him, accompanied by his patented smile. "Sunshine." He didn't know why Justin suddenly smiled his brilliant Sunshine smile until it dawned on him that he had said _Sunshine_ out loud.

Justin didn't need Brian to bottom for him to know that the brunet loved him. He rolled them so that Brian was on top and spread his legs and completely wrapped them around him as tight as possible. He lowered his eyelids a bit, calmed his smile, moved one hand to Brian's lower back and in the sexiest voice he could, said, "I believe you were about to fuck me into the mattress, weren't you Mr. Kinney?" knowing how Brian was immediately turned on the moment that he used the formal title.

Sure enough, Brian's cock responded, as well as his libido, to that. Not only to Justin saying 'fuck me' but also to his use of _Mr. Kinney_. It always made him so fucking hard when Justin said that.

_Little fucker, he knows just what to say and how to say it to make me forget everything._

"You're almost correct Mr. Taylor," he stated, using his sexiest voice, knowing its power, especially over this particular man.

Justin moaned at that name, and that tone of voice, before responding, a little more breathlessly than he thought possible, "Almost?"

"I don't believe … I _know_ I was just about to make love to you." Justin gasped at that, and couldn't help the tear that slid down his cheek. It might not have been a declaration, nor what he was more than willing to say. But for this _I-don't-believe-in-love-I-believe-in-fucking_ man to use the word love in reference to sex, said more to Justin than anything else Brian could have done or said.

"Please," Justin said even more breathless, and maybe a little desperate. He couldn't think of anything else to say, so he repeated what Brian said, "Please make love to me."

Brian reached over for the lube and condom. Justin grabbed the condom as soon as Brian opened it and leaned up a little to put it on Brian, causing him to moan at Justin's smaller, warm hands on his cock. Brian lubed up two fingers and slowly worked Justin open, stretching him carefully and gently. He reveled in the looks of delicious pleasure on Justin's face and absorbed the gasps and moans that Justin was making. As soon as he felt Justin was prepared he slowly eased his fingers out and slid his cock in just as gently.

Both men moaned at Brian entering Justin. Brian always marveled at how tight Justin's ass was, every fucking time. Justin was amazed that every time Brian was inside him he had never felt so connected, so turned-on. They shared heated looks, and even hotter kisses. Brian took his time, slowly sliding in and pulling out. Slowly in and out – the action was repeated over and over again. He was carefully, but purposely, grazing across Justin's prostate each time he moved. Both men were completely taken with the other and were amazed at how much the other man meant to him. This heated and primal act could be so slow and torturous, amazing and wonderful, hot and sensual, erotic and beautiful... absolute perfection.

They both felt their orgasm approaching, and approaching fast. No matter how slow they wanted to take it, they couldn't help but speed up. Brian started moving faster and faster, encouraged and even more aroused as Justin began panting 'harder, faster'. He was unable to hold back his own moans, not that it mattered, they were drowned out by Justin's moaning and almost chanting of Brian's name every time his prostate was rammed.

Brian grabbed Justin's cock and began jacking him off at the speed of his fucking. With that they came, together, both shouting in ecstasy. Justin came all over his chest and Brian's hand, and Brian filled the condom so full he thought it might overflow.

_Fuck, if that's the kind of orgasm that I can have every night… I definitely don't need anyone else. _

And that thought was proven a few times throughout the night. Each time they started slow, with slow kisses, tender touches, and gentle caresses, ending in hard, fast, deep pounding, hot and messy.

After the third time of explosive climaxes, both men practically passed out in exhaustion. They were both completely, absolutely and brilliantly sated. They didn't care about the candles that had long since burned out. They were certainly looking forward to waking up together. They knew that, even when the weekend was over, there wouldn't be any separations or nights away from the other.

As Brian pulled a drag off of his post sex cigarette, he felt he needed to explain something to his new roommate and bedmate. "I want to explain something to you. About earlier. It's just that I don't bottom for anyone. The last time I did – I was with this group of guys at a party and we'd all had too much to drink. I lost control of the situation and …"

Justin put his finger over Brian's mouth. "You don't have to explain."

Brian put out his cigarette and looked intently at his lover. "Maybe, someday, I won't feel so …"

"Out of control?

"Yeah, I guess."

"Think of it this way, Brian. It would be a way for me to share with you all of the wonderful sensations that you can only have when you're a bottom. And, in turn, I can enjoy the feelings I know I can experience in being a top. It's about sharing … and trust."

"I trust you. You know that."

"I _do_ know that, but I meant trusting yourself as well. Maybe we can do it in the future, when you're ready. But it doesn't bother me at all just being your bottom boy." Justin said with a smirk. He wanted Brian to feel okay about the whole thing, and know that he was okay with whatever he wanted, or didn't want, in bed.

Brian smiled and kissed Justin. "I'm quite happy with you being my bottom boy. And you are the only man I trust, so, yes, someday." Brian lay on his back and smiled, glad that they'd worked this out.

Justin smiled, and then got an idea. He may understand Brian's need for control and topping, but that didn't mean that Justin couldn't speed the process up a bit. Justin started talking, like he was thinking to himself, but hoping it had the right reaction on Brian. He leaned closer to Brian's ear and huskily started to speak. "I'll wait as long as necessary, because it'll be so worth it. I know just how I'll start, too. I'll rim you for an hour, tongue fucking you until you can't stand it, moving my tongue in and out, knowing your ass will taste as good as your cock. Then I'll slide my strong fingers into you one at a time, stretching your tight hole to make you ready for me."

He could definitely tell he was getting to Brian. He leaned even closer and practically growled, thoroughly turning himself on by his description, and the thought of doing just what he was saying.

"I'll curl my lubed fingers around until they graze your prostate, while I suck your cock until your sweet pre-cum moistens my lips. As I kiss you with my sweetened lips, I'll bring your knees up enough to be able to see your sensitive puckered opening. As my fingers pull out I'll slowly work my cock inside you. Little by little I'll inch forward until I'm firmly embedded inside you. Then the fun begins. I'll ram you and slam my body into yours until my balls are slapping against your ass. Over and over again the heat will increase … the rhythm will increase until neither of us can stand it anymore. Your sweet cum will shoot over your chest and I'll lick it up with my tongue. As I kiss you with your cum on my tongue, I'll keep fucking you until I shoot into you, yelling out my orgasm. It'll be so … fucking … good."

While Justin had been describing the scene, Brian was getting hard and touching himself. Justin's hand was rubbing the crack of Brian's ass – never penetrating – but stimulating. By the time Justin got to the end, Brian lost it and came – shooting sweet white cum on his chest.

Justin smiled at the fact that just a little stimulation and his own sexy words were enough to get Brian off.

Brian, still breathing heavy, looked at his blond lover. "So, maybe sooner than you think."

They laughed, cleaned up a bit, and then snuggled into each other's arms and went to sleep. Neither pointing out that that was fucking hot.


	8. CHAPTER EIGHT  THE SHOW AND THE SNOW

Thursday, February 9, 2006

Brian was talking to Justin after a day's work.

"Marvin came to my new agency and propositioned me again. He wants me to show up at his hotel room tonight to show him … certain sexual favors … in return for which he'll guarantee that he'll let us do his ad campaign."

"Did you do anything with him before?"

"I was at his hotel room, naked, he was just about to put my cock in his mouth when the phone rang with a family emergency. His kid broke some appendage or other. I told him he had to go home and left the room carrying my clothes."

"Did you get the ad contract?"

"No."

"Are you going to go to his room tonight?"

"No."

"Cause, I mean, if you did… I mean if you wanted to…"

"Justin, no."

"We haven't really talked about it, and I know that you're trying, but… "

"Leave it, Justin." Brian was increasingly irritated at the questions. He didn't want to say what Justin was pushing him towards.

"I'm just saying." Justin shrugged as he turned to walk away.

Brian closed his eyes, and gathered up his courage to say "Because I love _you_, all right?" Justin stopped and turned around. He slowly smiled with a hopeful look on his face. Brian went up to him and put his hands on either side of the young man's face. Their foreheads touched and Brian closed his eyes. "I love you and I don't want to be with anyone else." Their eyes met and Justin could see the emotion in what Brian had just confessed. The hazel eyes reflected the relief of finally admitting his feelings along with the fear of what it meant. Justin wanted to soothe away any fears. They kissed.

"I love you, too." Justin was elated. He'd been hoping to hear those words for months from Brian. The blond knew not to make a big deal out of the admission. He didn't want Brian to regret what he said. They hugged each other close.

Brian said. "Let's go out and have dinner, then maybe hit a dance club."

"Great. I'll go change."

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They went to dinner at a Mexican restaurant and did some tequila shots. Brian got a laugh because after Justin had two shots he was pretty drunk.

As they were leaving the restaurant and hailing a cab to go to a club, Justin said, "So, do you think Marvin will be pissed he didn't get to have you tonight?"

"Fuck him."

"No, thanks. I'd rather fuck you."

Brian smiled. "That's the plan." They kissed.

"Hey, I have an idea! If Marvin can't have you himself, do you think he's enough of a voyeur to be interested in seeing you and I doing it? We could go to his hotel and fuck on his bed." Justin bounced his ass repeatedly off of Brian's crotch.

"Hmmm. He's probably enough of a deviant to get into that." Brian stilled his young friend's suggestive actions.

"Maybe you could still get the contract and you wouldn't have to touch him."

"And you'd be OK with doing that in front of him?"

"We do it at the baths and Stefan's all of the time, who cares if it's in front of some middle aged millionaire? Private show. Kinda kinky." Justin's hands were all over Brian.

Brain laughed. "I don't know who is kinkier, you or him."

"Whaddya say?"

"We can ask him. Why the fuck not?"

They got in a cab and went to Marvin's hotel. Brian knocked on the door of Marvin's room.

"Brian. I thought you weren't going to show up." He looked at Justin. "Who is this?"

"Mr. Marvin, this is Justin, my … considering the confines of the language it's hard to define."

"I'm the guy he's fucked more than once." Justin offered.

"Right." Brian turned to Marvin. "Here's the deal, you can't have me tonight, but we're willing let you watch us do it."

"What?"

"Wanna watch us fuck?" Justin asked.

"That wasn't our deal, Kinney." Marvin was slightly irritated.

"That's _my_ deal, take it or leave it." Brian sneered. He knew this was highly unorthodox, but certainly not unheard of in the cut throat dealings of advertising. This was just business, and he got to profit. Fortunately Justin was ridiculously horny when he was drunk, and clearly wasn't thinking clearly, because he was pretty sure Justin was the type of person that would find this kind of 'business deal' unethical and immoral.

Marvin looked Brian over, and then spoke to Justin. "Take your coat off, let me see you."

Justin began stripping; coat, shirt … as he started to unzip the fly of his pants, Marvin could see how attractive and eager the young man was.

Marvin smiled, "OK, you're on."

"And you'll let Kennedy and Collins do your ad campaign?"

"If you guys are hot enough, yeah. And I get to tell you what to do."

Brian and Justin looked at each other and nodded. "Sure."

Marvin walked into the bedroom and the guys followed him. They waited for instruction.

Marvin pointed to Justin. "You, strip."

Justin happily obliged and in no time was standing there naked. Brian snickered a little because he could tell his young lover's inhibitions were all but gone.

Marvin continued. "Now undress Brian while standing behind him."

Justin smiled at Brian and slid in behind him. His arms reached around and pulled Brian's shirt off, followed by his pants and socks. Justin ran his hand around the inside of Brian's underwear, causing Brian to react with soft moans. Then the underwear was removed.

"Now blow him."

Justin kissed Brian passionately and moved him towards the bed. He pushed his brunet lover to sit on the bed, then got on his knees and began a skillful blow job. Brian's head went back and he ran his fingers through the blond hair in his lap. Marvin sat in a nearby chair, unfastened his pants and began stroking himself.

"Brian, rim him."

Justin smiled and climbed onto the bed, face down, ass in the air. Brian positioned himself, spread his lover's cheeks with his thumbs, and began rimming him. Justin reacted with gasps and moans.

Marvin, too, began appreciative growls. "Now fuck him."

Brian got condom and lube from his pants pocket. Justin rolled onto his back and began preparing himself, while Brian rolled the condom onto his hard cock. He watched patiently as his blond lover probed his own ass with the fingers of one hand while stroking his own hard-on with the other. Brian loved what he saw. "So fucking hot."

"Do it."

Brian positioned himself and moved Justin legs onto his shoulders. He thrust forward and claimed the ass in front of him in one swift motion. Justin gasped in elation. They began to rhythmically move together in a passionate embrace. They kissed and moaned into each other's mouths. The excitement began to build. They continued this way for quite some time, kissing and fucking.

"Bend him over the bed and do it standing up."

Justin nodded in agreement and the guys repositioned themselves per request. Brian's cock found it's home again and the thrusting began anew. He reached around and grabbed Justin's cock with a firm grip, causing him to gasp and moan.

"Justin, I want to watch you come."

Justin stood up and they kissed. Brian's hand continued stroking the young man's dick while the passion arose. Justin had one hand behind Brian's neck as the other pulled at his hip. He came with an explosive yell and shot cum all over the bedspread and Brian's hand.

Marvin, too, reacted and shot a load of his own. Brian bent Justin over the bed and achieved his own orgasm.

"Oh, my God. That was fantastic!" Marvin said.

Brian smiled as he pulled out and disposed of the condom. "Another satisfied customer."

Justin laughed and collapsed onto his back on the bed. Brian crawled on top of him and they kissed passionately.

Marvin said, "You have a deal, Kinney."

Brian looked at him, smiled, nodded, and then went back to kissing his young lover.

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Wednesday, March 8, 2006

Ted came into Brian's office seemingly in a hurry. "Here's the file you wanted, Brian. Is that all?"

"What's your rush, Theodore?"

"Blake is calling me at nine this morning and we're going to make plans for the weekend. I don't want to miss his call."

"Where are you going? Paris? Milan?"

Ted gave Brian a smirk. "No. For your information, we're going to Vermont for some skiing. It's the same place where we reconnected a few months ago when he was on the gay ski team. Emmett and I were there because Todd and I broke up…"

Brian interrupted. "I remember. Emmett started seeing Cal after that. Is it a nice place?"

"It's wonderful. Luxurious but rustic accommodations. Great skiing. Cozy lodge with fireplaces. Hot tubs all over the place." Ted tilted his head back and closed his eyes thinking about the place.

Brian pondered the weekend. "Justin's been wanting to get away for a weekend. I know he snowboards. Maybe we can go, too. I could use a couple of days off."

"That'd be super, Brian! Emmett and Cal are going to be there, too."

"Pittsburgh reunion then, eh?" Brian watched as Ted nodded enthusiastically. "Don't think that means Justin and I will be hanging out with you guys all weekend. When we're not on the slopes I plan on having him back in the room…"

"Fucking his brains out. Yes, Brian. I know."

Brian smiled at Ted's understanding. "Book flights and reservations for Justin and me, too, then. You've got my credit card number. If we talk about work for five minutes during dinner we should be able to write off the whole meal to Kennedy & Collins, right?"

Ted grinned, and then got a serious 'accountant' look on his face. "Sure, Brian. I think that would be perfectly acceptable."

"Thanks, Theodore. That'll be all."

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That evening Brian told Justin about their plans for the weekend, much to the enthusiastic response of his lover. They packed their bags and confirmed the plans and reservations with Ted.

Thursday, March 9, 2006

The weekend started off very well. Brian was impressed with the resort and Justin loved the slopes. They enjoyed the dining, the lodge and the king sized bed in their room. Ted was surprised how much time Brian and Justin _did_ spend with the rest of the gang.

Sunday, March 12, 2006

It was the final day of the planned long weekend. Justin was snowboarding with Cal and Blake. Brian had skied for a while, but had put up his skis for the weekend and was in the lodge with Ted and Emmett. They were sitting and sipping coffee when Blake ran up to them.

"Guys! Cal and Justin collided and got hurt. They've taken them to the infirmary."

The men jumped up and ran to the mini hospital at the lodge. As they were on their way there, Blake said, "I think Justin's just shook up, but Cal got hit pretty bad."

As they arrived, the nurse was talking to Justin, who was sitting up on a gurney in the hallway. Brian went up to him and hugged him. "Are you OK? What happened?"

Justin was holding his head and winced a little. "I don't know. One minute Cal and I were 'boarding along. He zigged right and didn't realize how close I was. We hit and I fell down. I guess he hit something. They have him back there."

Brian asked the nurse, "Did Justin get x-rayed?"

"Yes. He's fine. No concussion. But he should take it easy the next few days. I've just been telling him what symptoms to look for that indicate problems; dizziness, blurred vision, extreme headache. But, I think he'll be fine. Are you his…?"

"I'm his partner." Brian said.

"Well, make sure he follows my instructions, OK?"

"Yes, I will."

She patted Justin on the arm, they nodded their thanks and she walked away.

Justin looked up at Brian and smiled. That was the first time Brian had used the word 'partner' to describe him. Maybe it was the blow to the head, but the blond started to tear up with emotion. Brian hugged him again.

"I was so fucking scared. I'm glad you're OK. I love you."

"I love you, too." They kissed. "Now we have to find out about Cal."

They walked over to where Emmett was talking to another nurse. "… but I _have_ to see him."

"I'm sorry, sir."

Brian asked, "What's the problem?"

"They have Cal in an exam room and they won't let me see him."

Brian turned to the nurse, "Why the hell not?"

"Only family is allowed. And spouses or someone with medical power of attorney. It's our policy. I'm sorry."

Ted lashed out. "That's bullshit! They're together. They're partners."

She shrugged and walked away. Justin hugged Emmett as he started to cry. "It'll be OK, Em."

"How are you, honey?" Emmett asked.

"I just got my bell rung. I'll be OK."

Emmett tried to smile for a second, and then started to think of Cal again. "My poor baby."

After what seemed like an eternity of waiting, Cal was put in a regular room and they were all allowed to see him. He had a torn muscle in his shoulder and a slight concussion. The guys hung around the room for a while. Cal was barely awake and Emmett held his hand, happy that his boyfriend was going to be OK. They had been living together in Pittsburgh for a couple of months. Emmett commented that he'd be playing nurse to Cal for the next few days.

Brian, Justin, Ted and Blake all caught their scheduled flights home. Emmett was staying until Cal could be released to fly home to Pittsburgh.

Justin was nearly silent the whole trip home. Brian was used to Justin chattering about something or another, but was a little concerned that his young friend was so quiet. They got back to the condo and put their bags in the master bedroom. Justin lay down on the bed.

Brian couldn't stand the silence any more. "Are you OK, Sunshine? Are you feeling OK?"

Justin spoke into the pillow. "I'm fine."

"How's your head?" Brian reclined on the bed next to Justin and brushed his blond hair back.

"The bump is a little sore, but I'm OK."

"But …" Brian knew there was more to the story.

"It's not fair."

"What? That the spring sale at Prada is over?"

Justin ignored Brian's flip comment and began to vent. "I'm just thinking how it sucks that Emmett couldn't see Cal until he was in a regular room. Just because we're gay doesn't give them the right to treat us differently. When I think of all that time worrying, not knowing if he was alive or dead. If they were married, he would've been able to see him."

"Or unless Em had the paperwork on him with medical power of attorney. Michael and Ben signed papers for that, as well as Lindsay and Melanie. They also did the full partnership thing."

Justin nodded, and then continued. "What if the situation was reversed? What if _**I**_ got the worst of it? How would you feel if I was in a hospital room with a bashed head and you couldn't do anything but stand in the hallway and look through the window at me?"

"That would suck."

"And if I couldn't see you if you got sick or hurt…" Justin trailed off and put his head on Brian's shoulder.

"It's OK, Sunshine. Everyone's going to be OK."

"For now, but … I don't know. It's too much to think about."

"You need to rest. Let's take a shower and go to bed."

After their shower, they climbed into bed. Justin rested his head again on Brian's shoulder and soon drifted off to sleep. Brian, however, was just enjoying listening to his blond friend breathing softly. He considered what was said about not having the rights to see each other. He considered the fact that if he died, he'd want to make sure that Justin would inherit the condo and share the other assets with Gus. He thought about what it would be like if he lost Justin, the blond bundle of energy that came into his life and turned everything upside down. Thoughts he definitely didn't want to entertain at all, thoughts that affected him much deeper than he thought possible.


	9. CHAPTER NINE  PARTNERS PLUS

Monday, March 13, 2006

Brian went to work the next day after making Justin promise to take it easy all day.

As he was driving to work, Brian heard a song on the radio that spoke to him – to his heart. It fit what he was feeling, what he'd been thinking for months.

_Always searching, always empty_

_Living life as it comes_

_Running fast, loving fast_

_Moments strung together with loneliness_

_Now because of you_

_I see what love can be for me_

_You've opened my eyes and my heart_

_I didn't know I was waiting this whole life for the truth, the truth is you._

_I didn't believe it would happen for me_

_I expected to end up alone_

_Until your smile opened my heart_

_To the beauty one person can hold._

_Now because of you_

_I see what love can be for me_

_You've opened my eyes and my heart_

_I didn't know I was waiting this whole life for, the truth, the truth is you._

_Your love fills me_

_I see my future in your eyes_

_Your love thrills me_

_Forever is just the start with you_

_Now because of you_

_I see what love can be for me_

_You've opened my eyes and my heart_

_I didn't know I was waiting this whole life for, the truth, the truth is you._

_Always happy, always complete_

_I never knew this is what I was missing_

_Now I understand how all the best stories _

_Have happily ever after endings._

_Now because of you_

_I see what love can be for me_

_You've opened my eyes and my heart_

_I didn't know I was waiting this whole life for, the truth, the truth is you._

He repeated the final words out loud, "The truth is you." It summed up what he was feeling about Justin. He made a decision about some changes he needed to make in his life.

When Brian got to the office, he approached Ted. "Good morning, Theodore. Have you heard from Auntie Em?"

"Yeah, he sent me a text that they'll be flying home tomorrow around lunchtime."

"Good. Hey, Cynthia's not here yet, would you mind getting my lawyer on the phone?"

"Yeah, no problem." He looked at Brian. "Is everything OK?"

Brian looked around to see if anyone was listening. The coast was clear. "I'm thinking of forming a legal partnership with Justin and doing all of the medical power of attorney and wills." He shrugged. "Protect Gus, too."

Ted nodded. "That's great, Brian. That's … that's … excellent." He smiled. He'd never imagined that Brian could feel strongly enough about someone to form a partnership with him. He was happy for his friend.

"Not a word of this. Do you understand?" Brian gave him a threatening look.

"No. You got it." Ted paused. "What did Justin say?"

"I haven't asked him yet. But, how can he say no to me?" He said with a grin and his usual dose of ego.

"How could he? Certainly not." Ted grinned back. They understood each other very well. Brian was sure that his secret was safe with Ted.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - BJ

When Brian got home, Justin was already there and dinner was started.

"Hey, Sunshine." They hugged and kissed their hellos.

"Hey, Brian."

"How are you feeling?"

"Fine. I need to talk to you about something, Brian."

"OK. I have something to ask you, too, but go ahead."

Justin gathered his courage and talked in one long stream of words, "I think that we should become partners, legal partners, so that if anything happens like it did for Emmett and Cal we can be there for each other. I know you probably don't want to do that and are going to fight me on this but if you don't then I …"

"OK."

"Huh?"

"I said OK."

Justin's face brightened. "Really?"

Brian went up to him and put his arms around his waist. "I was going to suggest the same thing. That's what I was going to talk to _you_ about. Great minds think alike. I've already spoken to my lawyer about writing everything up."

"Oh, Brian, that's great."

"After facing cancer practically alone and then seeing Emmett and Cal … I realize that this is the best way to protect our rights to share everything. Will you be my partner, partner?"

"Yes, I will. I love you."

"I love you, too." They kissed.

"Do you …" He thought better of his question and stopped himself. "Never mind."

"Do I what?"

Justin asked. "Do you think that you'd ever want to get married?"

"Why? Are you proposing?"

Justin smiled and then shook his head. "I know that it'd just be a symbolic ceremony and all."

"I don't see the need to go through a ceremony that doesn't hold up under the law. How about, next time we're in Pittsburgh we have a party at a suite at our favorite hotel there and spring it on everyone about the partnership? Make it a little celebration of us?"

"That'd be great, Brian. That's all I need… to be able to share how we feel with friends and family."

"That's a plan, then."

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The guys didn't get a chance to go back to Pittsburgh that spring, though. Kennedy and Collins kept Brian very busy and he was out of town chasing down clients sometimes a week at a time. Ted and the lawyer were the only ones who knew that Brian and Justin were legal partners.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - BJ

Saturday, May 6, 2006

It was Justin's birthday and Brian, who didn't _used to_ believe in celebrating birthdays, told his partner that they'd be going out to dinner and that Lindsay and Melanie were in town to help them celebrate.

They got dressed up and went to Fortunato's, the same place that they had been to on their first date. While Justin was saying hello to the girls, Brian spoke to the maitre d'.

Brian said. "Come on, everyone. We're going to be dining in the back tonight."

They stepped into a small banquet room in the back of the restaurant. As soon as Justin entered the room a whole group of people yelled "Surprise!"

"You threw me a surprise party? Brian, that's amazing."

"You don't even know the half of it, Sunshine."

Everyone was there: Greg and Jerry, Michael and Ben, Emmett and Cal, Debbie and Carl, Ted and Blake, Jennifer and Tucker, Molly, Daphne and her boyfriend John, and Lindsay and Mel had brought Gus and Jenny Rebecca.

They all sat to dinner. As they were finishing, Brian stood up and pulled Justin to his feet to stand beside him. He got the group's attention. "Thank you all for being here for Justin's 24th birthday. As you may know, he and I have been living together since the beginning of the year. We took stock of our relationship a while back…"

Emmett piped in, "Did you say relationship?" He pretended to faint. Everyone laughed.

Brian gave Emmett a smirk. "Yes. Anyway … we decided, at almost the same time, to become legal partners and we signed the papers for that last month."

They kissed. The group applauded and offered their congratulations.

Brian turned to Justin and spoke from the heart. "We both agree that going through a wedding ceremony, while it's fine for some, doesn't mean anything legally – not right now – in New York or even Pennsylvania. But, since we're partners and have committed our finances and lives together, I wanted you to have something as a consistent reminder of our intention to someday marry. Consider these a symbol of our love." He presented a black lacquered box and opened it to reveal two rings that were twists of bronze and gold. "Justin Taylor, will you marry me, someday?"

"Yes, Brian Kinney, I will … someday."

The crowd cheered as Brian pulled Justin to him and gave him a passionate kiss. As the kiss ended he said, "The laws are changing all of the time. Maybe we won't have to wait too long." He put the ring on Justin's finger.

Justin smiled. "I'll be engaged to you forever if I have to." He put Brian's ring on his finger.

Brian got a more serious look on his face. "I hope you don't mind that we do it this way."

"No, not at all. It suits me fine."

Brian smiled, and then winced a little. "One little thing…"

"Yes?" Justin braced himself.

"I'm not going to call you my fiancé … I'll call you my partner, OK? Fiancé is just so … out of my vocabulary."

"You can call me anything you want, as long as you call me yours."

"Definitely mine. I love you."

"I love you, too."


	10. CHAPTER TEN  EPILOGUE

~ Five and a half years later ~

Friday, August 12, 2011

"Hello, Mr. Taylor."

"Call me Justin, and you are?"

"Reverend Higgins, Universal Life Church."

"Pleased to meet you, Reverend Higgins."

"Please, sit down, Justin. So, are you excited about the ceremony tomorrow?"

"Yes. It's been a long time coming."

"How long have you known Brian? Tell me about you two."

"We met in July of 2005. I'd moved here about a month before and he'd been here for three years. We're both from Pittsburgh originally. We met when I was hired as a consultant for the ad firm he was working for. Sparks flew right away and we got together within a couple of weeks of our first meeting. We started dating. I moved in with him about six months later and we became legal partners within a few months."

"When did you know that you were in love with him?"

"Almost right away. Within a couple of weeks of our first date I realized that what I was feeling for him was greater than anything I'd ever felt before. I had had a few relationships in college, but nothing like this. This was truly love. I told him I loved him our first Christmas together."

"And did he tell you that he loved you, too?"

Justin shook his head. "Brian was always funny about love … saying 'I love you'. His family history made it hard for him to believe in it, let alone say. It took him months to tell me that he loved me, too. But, even before that, I knew he did."

"How?"

"In the things he did, the way he looked at me. The way …" He blushed. "The way he'd make love to me."

Rev. Higgins nodded and smiled. "When did you promise to marry?"

Justin smiled at the memory. "On my birthday, in May of 2006. We said that day, though, that we wouldn't have a ceremony until we could do it legally in New York."

Rev. Higgins consulted his list of questions. "Do you and Brian ever fight?"

"Sure. Yeah. But nothing compared to some couples." He rolled his eyes, thinking of fights he'd witnessed. "I've worked on him over the years, hopefully improving his communication skills. He used to keep everything bottled up. Now he's much better. We always manage to work things out one way or another."

"Tell me about Jacob."

"He's three years old now. He's our little ray of sunshine and we love him very much."

"He's biologically yours, correct? He looks just like you."

"Biologically he's mine. In our hearts he belongs to both of us."

"How was he born? Surrogate?"

"Yes. We found an egg donor and then a surrogate to carry him. There was a lot of hassle, expense and red tape, but we got through it and were rewarded with our beautiful son."

"Do you want any more children?"

"Truthfully, no. Jacob is all I wanted. We have other kids in our lives."

"Where do you see you and Brian in 10 years … 20 years in the future?"

"Living in New York, growing old together, taking care of each other, loving each other. Hopefully, for a long, long time."

"Thank you for your time, Justin."

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - BJ

"Brian Kinney? Hello, I'm Reverend Higgins from the Universal Life Church. I'll be performing your wedding tomorrow."

"Reverend, call me Brian. Is this the part where you grill me?"

"Hardly a grilling, Brian. Just some questions so I can feel assured that everything is going to work out with you guys."

"He's put up with me this long, so I think we're good."

"How long have you known Justin? Tell me about you two."

"I know how this works. You asked him the same questions." Brian asked with one eyebrow raised. Rev. Higgins just shrugged and nodded. "I thought so. Let's see. Over six years ago I saw Justin standing on a sidewalk in front of a bar. He evaded me that night, but a few days later he walked into my office to consult on an ad campaign I was working on."

"He didn't mention meeting you on the sidewalk."

"We didn't meet, just exchanged glances. I never told him I'd remembered seeing him." He mentally drifted while recalling it. "He was the most beautiful man I'd ever seen." He focused again on the conversation. "Still is."

"When did you know that you were in love with him?"

"It took me a while to realize it, I guess. I'd never been in love before. To tell you honestly, I didn't know I was capable of loving someone … romantically. But, Justin proved to me that I could. I knew within a few weeks of our first meeting, although it took me a while to tell him."

"When did you promise to marry?"

"We exchanged rings on his birthday in May of 2006. Easier for me to remember – the day we got engaged and his birthday – same day." Brian grinned.

"Tell me about your son."

"I have two sons. Gus is eleven. He was born to my friend Lindsay. He's being raised by her and her hus.. , er, wife Melanie. Mel has a daughter, J.R., with my best friend, Michael. Then, of course, there's three year old Jacob, 'Jake'. You met him. He's … a delight. I love him so much."

"How did you decide to have a child with Justin?"

"I saw how he watched me with Gus. I knew Justin wanted to have a kid and I wanted him to have a genetic offspring like I did. It's watching a piece of yourself going on in the world. I suggested the idea to Justin and he was thrilled at the opportunity. He's a great father."

"How's Gus with having a little brother?"

"He's great with Jake. He kind of babysits and has even changed a diaper or two. He and his moms and sister finally moved to New York last year so we can all be together now."

"That's nice." Rev. Higgins reviewed his notes. "Tell me about your business."

"With Justin's encouragement, I started Kinnetik three years ago, right around the time Jacob was born. It was a little nerve racking starting a new business and all of the expense of the surrogate all at the same time, but we made it work."

"Do you and Justin ever fight?"

"Yeah. We're normal that way. But, not so much fight as have disagreements. I've gotten better at communicating. We always work it out – through talking or other ways."

"Other ways?"

Brian grinned. "Let's just say the best reaffirmations of our love occur in the bedroom."

"Do you want any more children?"

"No. I'm 41 now and I don't want to be too old to enjoy a little one. I wanted Jacob for Justin. We have Gus and even J.R. in our lives. That's enough."

Rev. Higgins smiled "Where do you see you and Justin in 10 years … 20 years in the future?"

"He'll be pushing me in a wheelchair as we go to Jacob's college graduation from law school." He smiled and then got a little more thoughtful. "Justin has given me so much." He paused and smiled again. "We'll be living in New York, taking care of each other, loving each other."

Rev. Higgins smiled. "Justin said something similar. In fact, all of your responses were very much alike."

"Great. So we're done here?"

"One more thing. Are you looking forward to tomorrow, Brian?"

"Yes. New York _finally_ came around to marriage equality. It will be one of the happiest days of my life."

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Saturday, August 13, 2011

The ceremony was a simple one. It was held at the same small banquet room at Fortunato's where Justin's birthday party was held six years before. Daphne entered on Michael's arm and they stood with the Reverend at the arch that had been placed at the front of the room. Gus Peterson-Kinney entered with Molly Taylor and they stood with the others. Young Jacob Taylor-Kinney came down the aisle carrying the pillow with the rings. Daphne took his hand. Brian and Justin came down the aisle holding hands and stood before Rev. Higgins.

"Dearly beloved, we are gathered here today to join Brian Kinney and Justin Taylor in holy matrimony." He smiled. "I interviewed both men yesterday to get to know them better. I must say that I see that they love each other very much and are on the same page about everything in their lives. They've written their own vows today, so I'll let them share them with us at this time. Brian?"

"Justin, when I met you I didn't know what romantic love was, but you showed me. You have brought so much life and happiness to me over the years. You are my Sunshine and every reward I have in life is because of you. I love you."

"Justin?"

"Brian. Where do I begin? When I met you I knew that there was something special between us, even though the fates decided that, not only would we not meet until we were both in New York, but we wouldn't _truly_ get together until days after our first meeting." The guys exchanged a secret smile over that. "Our connection was evident from the start. You've encouraged me, helped me, nurtured me, cared for me and loved me like no one can imagine. Our family – biological, extended or otherwise – and you is all I'll ever need. I love you so much."

The ceremony continued with further vows, promises and the exchange of rings. Roses were given to Jennifer and a tearful Debbie.

The reverend concluded. "By the power vested in me by the state of New York, I now pronounce you husbands, bound in holy matrimony. You may kiss."

They kissed, softly at first, then more deeply. Everyone applauded. There was no receiving line, but everyone gathered around and offered their congratulations. Dinner was served and everyone enjoyed an extravagant steak dinner. Toasts were offered by Michael, Daphne, Jennifer and even Gus. The themes of the toasts were all the same; Brian and Justin were made for each other and belonged together – forever and ever.

As they had their first dance together on the dance floor their love radiated throughout the room. Everyone could see how they felt and were happy for the two of them. After a time, others were encouraged to join them. Emmett danced with Cal, Michael with Ben, Debbie with Carl, Lindsay with Mel, Jennifer with Tucker. Even Gus reluctantly danced with Molly. Soon there was a party atmosphere. The music changed to more of a Babylon dance beat and jackets were shed, ties loosened and shoes came off. It was truly a celebration.

Near the end of the evening, Justin was walking by the coat closet, when an arm grabbed him and pulled him in. The lights were off and the door shut behind him. A familiar sultry voice asked, "Have you ever done it with a married man?"

Justin smiled, "No, I don't believe I have. Have you?"

"Probably." Brian chuckled, "But, if I did it was _years_ ago."

"So, what are you propositioning right now?"

"Come to the Presidential Suite of the W hotel with me and I'll make love to you for the rest of the night."

"Sounds good. Just don't tell my husband. Shhhh."

"Shhhh." Another chuckle was emitted from Brian's lips before they came crashing down onto Justin's. As the kiss broke, his lips went to his husband's ear. "I love you, Justin Taylor-Kinney."

"I love you, too, Brian Taylor-Kinney. – Forever and ever. "


End file.
